Amidst the War
by greyandhazel
Summary: Draco Malfoy failed his mission to kill Dumbledore. Narcissa Malfoy obliviates him and surrenders him to the order to save him. Will he end up lost or will the lack of his memories help him find his true self?
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1 - A Mother's Love **

Despite the darkness, the Manor still exhibited majesty with its vast garden and tall pillars amidst acres and acres of land. It was similar to a small forest, if not for the fountain and the well-trimmed hedges. Its beauty and glory was now concealed by the gloom that permeated the place. The Manor never was a place that one could consider warm. Its splendor invited a person in, not to stay, but to marvel at its greatness. People were awed by the magnificence it boasted. Animals, especially birds, sought shelter and protection amongst the soaring trees, making the Manor their home as well. There were albino peacocks that constantly roamed around the place, acting like they owned it. The Malfoys took a liking to those particular birds because they thought they resembled the family well: pale, royal and authoritative. Months into the invasion of Death Eaters, the Manor - on the outside - was the same. It did not lose an inch of space and there was not a tree out of place, and yet it was entirely different. The Malfoys insisted that their home look the same at least on the outside. Despite the grandeur it possessed, something, maybe the evil that seeped through the walls, or the haunting silence that was only broken by shrill cries, drove the people, aside from Death Eaters, away. The Manor's newfound eeriness did its worst to the animals; whatever power it possessed sentenced the animals to their deaths. The regal albino peacocks that resembled them in so many ways were nowhere to be found.

Draco cautiously entered the doors, yearning for a sense of safety. But the place he once called home now reeked of dark magic and his ears were filled with screams from the tortured prisoners bellowing through the walls. Terror engulfed him. Dread enveloped his soul. He was horrified of the implications of his actions, of his hesitation that ultimately led to his failure. He did not expect to feel such trepidation upon entering his own home because after all, it was his haven. He did not know how he let it slip his mind that their once lovely Manor was now the headquarters of Death Eaters. Upon the realization, he wanted to flee, to disappear, to be eaten by the earth. He would have surrendered, let himself be consumed by the fear if not for the loving voice of his mother and Snape's death grip on him.

"My darling boy!" Narcissa cried in relief as she wrapped her arms around her son upon his arrival at the Manor with Severus after Dumbledore's death. Consolation was evident in her eyes as she searched for the man who saved her son and walked cautiously until she reached his side.

"I will be forever grateful to you, Severus. Thank you for helping my son, for saving him," Narcissa whispered to Severus while tears flowed from her eyes. Narcissa paused, "Although, I still have my concerns. I will speak with you ―"

Severus had released Draco from his grip the moment Narcissa wrapped her arms around her son and waited for the woman to finish what she wanted to say. He narrowed his eyes when the wait took longer than he expected. He attempted to leave the room, but was halted by Bellatrix's unsettling voice.

Howling winds and tortured cries seemed to announce Bellatrix's presence. Her paleness and emaciated body was illuminated by the dim light of the room. Her eyes screamed of madness but her face held a regal yet haunting beauty that compared to that of her sister's.

"Cissy, what were you whispering to Severus? Did you not know that he stole Draco's glory and your redemption by killing Dumbledore?" she hissed while eyeing Severus.

Severus pierced Bellatrix with his glare. "I refuse to explain myself to you, Bellatrix. I only answer to the Dark Lord." With that, Severus made to leave the room that was filling with tension between the two sisters.

"Stay, Severus," Narcissa paused and faced Bellatrix. "It is fitting, dearest sister. The job had to be done for Draco to be alive. Severus needed to fulfill the terms of the Vow for him not to die. I do not think that the Dark Lord would appreciate it if he lost one of his most faithful Death Eaters simply due to the fact that I begged him to help my son. Unless…"

"Unless what, Cissy?"

"Unless you want Draco and I to die." Narcissa's words were stern but laced with pain as she gazed at her sister.

"You are mistaken, Cissy. All I wanted was for Draco to be honored by the Dark Lord. There is nothing that I desire more than the redemption of your family in the Dark Lord's eyes. I long for the days when we were both respected in this circle." Bellatrix LeStrange was known for many things, but her love for her sister and her care for her nephew often escaped other people's scrutiny.

"Draco and I are alive. Dumbledore is dead. That is all that matters," Narcissa declared as she went back to her son to embrace him.

"Draco is alive but I am certain he will not stay that way," Bellatrix hissed and searched for Severus eyes.

"If you choose to go around threatening my son, I suggest you clarify, Bella." Narcissa held her son tighter and threw her sister an accusing look.

Bellatrix tried to preserve the compassion in her voice. "The Dark Lord desired to reach an end through Draco, but your son failed to comply with what the Dark Lord intended him to do." Bellatrix paused and inhaled, trying to keep her rage in check but yelled, "You, Severus, just killed my nephew!"

Draco was startled by Bellatrix's voice. His body began to tremble as the fear that he felt upon entering his home escalated to a new height. The tears that he was trying to hold back flowed from his eyes like rain. Narcissa's embrace tightened and Draco wished that his mother's hold could make him feel safe but despite the love that his mother tried to express, the fear was eating Draco alive.

Narcissa looked at Severus, her eyes searching for an explanation. "Is that a possibility?"

"You may hope against hope but I am afraid that for once, Bellatrix is correct." A trace of sympathy became evident in Severus' eyes as he gazed at Draco but his voice remained distant.

"You have to help me, Bella. I can't lose my son." Narcissa's body shook uncontrollably. Her breaths and her tears were overpowering her fragile body.

"I care for you, Cissy, and Draco being your son, I care for him as well, but there is nothing that I can do." Bellatrix paused and murmured, "Maybe you could ask to take Draco's life, to be certain that he does not suffer." Bellatrix gave her sister a small smile that seemed to accentuate the madness in her eyes. "Or I could do it. I promise not to make him suffer!"

"No! Nobody will kill my boy!" Narcissa yelled. She was shocked with herself with the sudden burst of emotions. She inhaled and said, "Nobody." She whispered and held Draco's hand, "Now if you will excuse me and my son. He needs to rest."

Narcissa could feel Draco's hand trembling in her own. She could hear his labored breathing and feel his suppressed cries. She wanted to give in to her own fears and tremble as much as him. She yearned for a release of the emotions that she was trying to contain but she was able to control herself. She remained strong. She tried with all of her power to appear that she was in total control of the situation when the truth was that she had no idea what she could do to save her son. She ignored all the emotions that were trying to claw out of her heart. She held Draco's hand tightly, wishing to give him a sense of security while she was around.

"My darling boy, I am so happy you are alive," Narcissa whispered. She tried for relief and glee to be apparent on her face as she led Draco to an empty room.

"Mother, I could not do it. I was standing in front of him. Dumbledore didn't have a wand, and mine was raised towards him. All I had to do was utter those two words and I could have had the honor; we could have been redeemed. I was a coward, Mother. Forgive me for failing you and Father." Draco put his hands on his face as he wailed desperately.

"Hush, my son. You did not fail me. I never wanted you to be a murderer. I know that you desperately want to be like your father, but you two are different. You have a good heart, Draco. I know because you came from me. I do not care if we're not redeemed, if we do not obtain the respect we used to have. I only care that you, my son, in your refusal to kill Dumbledore, have been redeemed. " Narcissa took Draco's hands from his face and looked into his eyes.

"How could I have been redeemed if death awaits me? Mother, he will kill me. You heard Aunt Bellatrix and Professor Snape! The Dark Lord will kill me. If he spares my life, I am sure Father will have me wishing I were dead. I failed! I ruined our only chance to atone for Father's errors. Now, the Dark Lord will punish our family all because of me. I am terrified, Mother!" Draco said as he trembled, tears still falling from his eyes.

"I will not allow him to kill you, my son. I am your mother and I will protect you. If Lucius does not come through for you, he will have me to answer to. Trust me. I will come back later, Draco. You need not worry about the Dark Lord for now." Narcissa kissed Draco on the forehead and left the room.

Draco trusted his mother but what power did she possess to avert the Dark Lord's and his father's fury? He could never escape his impending doom. He knew, in a matter of hours or days, he would be under the Dark Lord's clemency and the Dark Lord did not show mercy. He tried to close his eyes but when he did, all he saw were images of the Dark Lord torturing and killing his mother in front of him, warning him that he would be next. He fought; tried to shut his eyes and obtain the slumber that he needed. He tried to be brave, but he was no Gryffindor. He was a Slytherin, but he could not think of cunning ways to get out of this situation. Defeated, he opted to close his eyes, fully aware that in doing so he was welcoming unpleasant dreams and images that taunt his mind. He wished that upon arising, he would find that the hell he had been living was nothing but an ugly nightmare.

Narcissa was on the verge of tears, but she retained her composure and kept on walking. She could not show her weakness, at least not yet. She needed to appear brave to be in control of the situation. She put on a valiant face, hiding her apprehension. Narcissa loved Draco even more than her life. She thought, 'What mother would not sacrifice everything to save her son?' But guilt followed. She knew from the beginning that the Dark Lord would ask for their son, but she was too afraid to save him, to free him from the ties that bound her and Lucius. She feared for her own life. She was selfish. If anything were to happen to Draco, it would be her fault because she knew better, while Lucius was deluded by his insane ideals. She would never forgive herself. Perplexed by her own thoughts, she missed the room that she was looking for by a few steps. She stopped outside the door for a moment, took a deep breath, and stepped inside.

Narcissa walked into the room where Severus was "Severus, a moment in private, please."

Severus cast a _Muffliato _while Narcissa did her piece of magic to ensure the privacy of the room. The fear and worry was evident on Narcissa's face, while only indifference was prominent in Severus'.

"I think many people fail to notice how perceptive and powerful I am as a witch." Narcissa held her stern gaze upon Severus and then continued, "People deem me weak because my husband has failed the Dark Lord countless times. I do not get the respect I deserve because I choose to live in Lucius' shadow. I could be as recognized as Bella if I wanted to, but I do not desire that, Severus." Narcissa paused. "The Black family has always been certain of their stand about the purity of blood. I adhered to that because I did not want the same fate as Andromeda. When Lucius came home one night and told me all about pureblood supremacy and the Dark Lord, I did not say a word. I supported him like any good wife. "

"What are you trying to insinuate, Narcissa?" Severus interrupted, his eyebrows narrowed.

"Let me finish, Severus." She paused. "I did not care. I supported the so-called cause, stood idly by as Death Eaters inflicted havoc on both sides of the world. I have shared my fortune, my house and my name, but your Lord has decided that my son is the best payment for my husband's shortcomings. There is a limit to what I can give. I will not allow him to take Draco. Draco is only a boy. My boy!" Narcissa spat. Her words were lined with venom, revealing the Slytherin that she was.

"Are you questioning the Dark Lord?" Severus moved towards Narcissa with such viciousness, expecting her to back down.

Narcissa did not even flinch. She even smiled at Severus for his demonstration of ferocity.

"Your attempt at rage insults me, Severus. I am not afraid of you. You can scream, hiss and burn me with your eyes, but I would not even flinch at your displays of anger. I know your secret. Take Draco. Surrender him to the Order. There, he will be safeguarded. The Order of the Phoenix may be the enemy but those self-proclaimed protectors do not have it in them to take a boy's life. In our own home, my son is in mortal peril. Keep him safe. Take him to the enemy."

Severus was astonished with Narcissa's words. It took him a few seconds to fire his retort. "You want me to surrender your son, whom I just saved from the enemy?"

"You do not have to act around me, Severus. You are doing them a tremendous favor. Draco will be cared for." Narcissa let her stare linger for Severus to understand how serious she was.

"Narcissa, perhaps you have forgotten that I am a murderer, that I killed Dumbledore? I did the job that was supposed to be your son's. When you came to me for help, you had complete faith and now you are implying… What is it exactly?" Severus, with the smallest breath he could manage, turned his back to Narcissa and took a few steps away from the woman.

There was a small panic rising within Severus. Bellatrix had always doubted him, but it was expected because of her worship of the Dark Lord. Even when Narcissa asked for his help to aid Draco, Bellatrix doubted her. Only the unbreakable vow had pacified the woman. Severus had always perceived Narcissa as the sane one amongst the two. He did not expect that Narcissa would question his loyalty for the Dark Lord, especially when he did everything in his power to help the boy, even killing Dumbledore. Confusion started to creep upon his face but within a matter of seconds, it was gone.

"The real reason why you killed Dumbledore is beyond me, but as I've said, I am grateful, and always will be. That does not remove the actuality that you are what you are and I am aware of it." She walked up to Severus and looked him in the eye. "I know that I owe you enough for saving my son's soul and I would never know how to show my gratitude, but I need you to keep him safe. Nobody will know, Severus. I have known for a while and I did not tell a single human being. I just need you to keep Draco out of harm's way." For a moment, Narcissa lost her impeccable stance. She let out a sigh as fear and panic crept upon her gaze, and then tears fell from her eyes. "Please, Severus. I can't lose him. Please."

Severus looked away. He remembered his dread when he found out that Voldemort was going to kill Lily and for a moment, he was lost in his own thoughts. The fear that he felt fought its way back to his heart, immediately followed by the pain that lingered in his being. Once again, the guilt for being the reason why she lost her life found its way into his consciousness. He turned his back and walked, despite the trembling of his body. All the emotions he had kept hidden threatened to manifest themselves. He swallowed, wishing that through that act, his emotions would once again be hidden behind the façade that he had built for years.

Narcissa chased after Severus and upon reaching him, she went down on her knees and held on to his robes. "Please, Severus. Please. I can't have him kill my boy."

Severus helped Narcissa up, and when they were face to face, he gave her a piercing look. "I killed Dumbledore. I am afraid I already lost my right to ask favors from the Order, Narcissa."

"Please, Severus. Please." Narcissa held Severus' hands so tightly, they started to pale.

"I killed Dumbledore, Narcissa. Despite what you believe of my loyalty, I am certain that the Order despises me and would give everything to avenge their leader. You also must remember that Draco may be your boy, but in their eyes, he is not so innocent anymore considering the destruction that he caused in Hogwarts tonight. The Order may not kill him, but I am afraid after all that has happened, they will not be as lenient on him as you desire. There is no way for me to do what you ask." He paused. "My hands are tied, Narcissa. Believe me when I say that I want to save Draco. I want him to escape this hell that you and Lucius trapped him in, but there is no way that I can." Severus' voice remained cold and indifferent. His face still masked all the emotions that the situation stirred.

Narcissa let out a cry of anguish. "No, Severus! There must be a way! My son can't stay here! Surely, Voldemort will kill him!" Torment was becoming more and more apparent in Narcissa's voice. "Tell me what I must do, Severus. Tell me!"

"I am afraid you already know what to do, Narcissa, and there's nothing that I can do to help." With his final words, Severus left Narcissa alone in her anguish.


	2. Chapter 2

I would like to thank my betas: ddielle, ana0625 and Captain Eliza Rae for helping me with this story. This chapter is short, probably one of the shortest chapters that I have. The next chapter will be longer, I think, so it would compensate for this one. I just wanted to focus on Narcissa a wee bit more. Enjoy reading! Reviews are highly appreciated!

**Chapter 2 - Captured Moments**

Narcissa's mind went into overdrive, pondering Severus' words. She thought and thought, explored the recesses of her mind. Her head hurt from the effort but still she had not reached a solution.

Narcissa was an intelligent witch. She was certain of that truth about herself. She believed that she was the embodiment of a female Slytherin ― regal and cunning ― so she did not understand how Severus could find a solution other than what she thought of. She could not comprehend his solution; even after his hint and verbalization, it seemed to flee from her grasp.

She was at the point of near surrender. It was only at that moment that she realized the impossibility of saving her son. The Dark Lord desired what he wanted with such wildness that whatever got in his way would, without a doubt, suffer. She considered the idea of offering herself, but she knew that her life wasn't enough to appease the Dark Lord's lust for cruelty. Once again, her panic started to awaken and tears threatened to fall from her eyes. She paused and took a few deep breaths. She needed to be strong. She could not allow herself to be overcome by her weakness because her defeat would mean the death of her son.

Narcissa needed to find strength and she knew that she would find it with Draco. She wanted to go back to Draco's room and wrap him in her motherly love. She wanted to look at him while he slept; to adore the boy that she cherished with all her life. But she couldn't. She worried that all the emotions that she has tried so hard to contain would burst from her being. She feared that instead of finding strength, her weakness would catch up with her and finally steal what little chance she had left of saving her son.

She must be reminded of the good in her life. She longed for the years when the Dark Lord was absent. She yearned for those days of almost freedom, when she thought that the Dark Lord was gone eternally and her family would never be again ensnared in his hands.

Photographs. She thought of photographs. She realized that she could find the strength that she was seeking for in those images. They captured the years that she held dearly to her heart. They were the perfect reminder. The motions and movements in the photographs still made them seem real, when in reality, those captured moments were already lost, forever.

Slowly, she found her way to the room where they were being kept. She touched the silver handles and opened the large wooden doors with the Malfoy crest embossed intricately, boasting the letter M that was done in ornate white gold. The candles that were housed by the luxuriant chandelier bore light upon Narcissa's entry, sensing its master. Even after living in the Manor for so many years, it still awed her, completely especially those places that she did not frequent often. For a little while, the beauty made her forget. For a moment, she was freed from the fear that imprisoned her.

The sudden glow illuminated the photographs and portraits that Narcissa desired to see. She looked at them lovingly and grazed her fingers against the glass that housed her prized captured moments. Seeing the memories outside of her mind made her dwell in an alternate world, a reality that would never exist anymore; a beautiful existence that was under the illusion that it was already and forevermore liberated from the Dark Lord. She roamed around the room, not missing a single one and lingering on those that she held on to most dearly.

The memories pained her as much as they elated her. It hurt to see what Draco had been and to be reminded of what they had made him become. Oh, what would she not give to take away the fear that was caged in his eyes, to give him a sense of safety and to give back all that the presence of the Dark Lord in their lives had taken.

She wandered in the world of photographs and she let herself be lost in it. She took to her heart all the beautiful memories she had with her family. She let her eyes linger on every single one. She relived each moment. Once again, she felt the incomparable joy when she first held her little blond boy. She was drowned in the love that she experienced when she looked into those little grey eyes. She saw the proud look of Lucius and his exhilaration upon seeing his son.

"How can life be so cruel?" She whispered to herself. They were not the best people but they were not the worst. She thought that nobody deserved to feel the pain of losing a son, no matter how horrid that person was. She was angry. Furious at the world for letting her commit the mistakes that she made, leading her to the place that she was in. She did not understand. She may not be the nicest person but she was never cruel. Besides, she was raised to be cold, to not show her true feelings. But she had never been greedy. She shared her wealth, gave to charities and supported worthy causes. She blamed Lucius for dragging her and Draco into the condemned actuality they were enduring.

The paradise that she lived in for a couple of minutes vanished. She felt like she had been Side-Along Apparated without her consent, like she was rudely awoken from a beautiful dream. "How can life be so cruel?" she yelled. She grasped the nearest thing she could reach and threw it on the floor. The frame made a loud crashing sound as the shattered pieces of glass fell on the ground. Her eyes followed the destruction that she made and she gasped when she realized what she had broken. With tears flowing from her eyes, she ran to the damage on the floor and held it tightly with her bare hands. The shards of glass cut her porcelain skin, leaving drops of scarlet, tainting a remembrance of her past.

"No, no, no," She cried as she tried to wipe away the blood that flowed to the photograph. Her action just damaged the picture more, leaving a trail of crimson over Draco's grey eyes and pale face. One by one, she removed the pieces of glass that once protected her portrait with her son. Blood surged from her wounds but she was too overwhelmed to notice the pain. Once it was free from the glass, she held it tightly.

The photographs gave her strength but they also unleashed her weaknesses. Guilt threatened to take over. Narcissa blamed herself, for Lucius did not know better. He was too blind, she thought. She thought it was enough to have Dumbledore killed. How could she let it escape her thoughts that the Dark Lord did not know mercy?

Her dread escaped her mind and fought her body. Narcissa walked slowly, still clinging on the photograph as if her son's life depended on it, and searched for the nearest chair. She needed to rest her body to help placate her mind. Narcissa was afraid that she was going to pass out and that upon her awakening, would not have a son anymore.

Narcissa's panic helped her reach the chair that her body so needed. Slowly, she sat, grasped its handle with her left hand and put the picture on the chair. She closed her eyes while fighting fatigue. She took a deep breath and opened them once again and saw a covered rectangular object beside her chair. Gently, she reached for the cloth that concealed what she wished to see.

When Narcissa saw the portrait, her eyes widened and hope filled her heart. Realization dawned on her and tears were falling freely from her eyes. She was thankful. She was not certain if it would work or what would happen, but at that moment, a glimmer of hope was enough. She closed her eyes gratefully, while reprieve fought off the uncertainty.

"Narcissa."

The sudden company shocked her and her eyes were suddenly wide open. She searched for the man that the voice belonged to. She found the eyes that she sought and motioned for the man to come over.

"I realized that maybe you are too distraught to find the solution that I was referring to and -" Severus explained but his eyes followed Narcissa's line of sight and realization hit him.

She caressed the portrait and looked at Severus. She allowed herself a small smile.

"I gather that you now understand." Severus turned his back from the woman. He was relieved that somehow, Draco was going to escape the fate that Lily had met. If anybody saw his eyes, a little glimmer of happiness could be seen.

"Severus," Narcissa called after him. "Are you certain that the Dark Lord will murder my boy?"

"He will have him killed, yes. If not, he will suffer a fate worse than death."

"Why? He spared Lucius and all those that have failed during the mission in the Ministry. He even aided them to escape from Azkaban." Narcissa wished for Severus and her sister to be wrong. Hope filled her voice.

"Lucius, although a failure, is not a weakling. Your son, in his hesitancy to kill Dumbledore branded himself inadequate in the Dark Lord's eyes. He does not have any tolerance whatsoever for useless brats."

"But…" Narcissa was yet again at the verge of tears.

"But despair not. There is a way. Always." Severus was unsmiling but one could see the optimism in his eyes.

Severus turned his back. When he was a few steps away, Narcissa whispered, "Thank you."

Once again, Severus left her but the hopelessness that had filled the room was gone. There was a mutual feeling of ease as they parted. He was grateful, probably even more thankful than Narcissa. His actions had caused Lily's demise but now his propositions could mean Draco's salvation. Draco may not matter to him as much as Lily had, but he was glad that this time he was able to save a life instead of risk it. He rejoiced that he could bring happiness to a family instead of despair; relieved that instead of ripping a family apart, he could help in bringing one together.

As Severus left, comfort enveloped Narcissa. She celebrated the fact that all hope was not lost, that there was a way to save her son from the fate that the Dark Lord had set upon him. The chance, no matter how meager, to save Draco from death, consoled her.

Narcissa did not find total solace because she knew that in the end, she was bound to lose her son either to the Dark Lord or through her actions. As much as parting ways with Draco pained her to the core, she knew that separation through her actions was better compared to Draco dying and being robbed of the chance to survive a life entirely different than the one he was raised to live.

The thought of Draco's death chilled her body, like icy water being poured over her being. Her mind was awake and her heart was beating fast. In that moment, she was more certain than she ever was. She was to lose her son and through that, she could give him a new life. Her torment was still there and she knew that it would never leave, but she knew that the pain would be worth it. Draco would experience another dawn, maybe different from all the sunrises that he had known all his life, but a sunrise nonetheless. She knew that Draco would experience the daybreak in another place, in another world. She could almost feel the wretchedness that will cripple her and damage her beyond repair, but every single sacrifice, every single tear that she shed, would mean another day for her boy. Narcissa knew what to do, but knowing, even being certain, did not alleviate her suffering.

Anticipating her separation with her son, Narcissa gave in to her desire to hold him. Slowly and quietly, she entered the room where she left Draco. She made sure that her beloved boy was already asleep. Spending the night with her son was a luxury that she allowed herself to have. Soon, Lucius and she will not have an heir anymore. The clock was ticking and the sun threatened to rise, robbing Narcissa of precious moments with him. She wanted to withdraw from the world and shut everything down. She wanted to immerse herself in that moment, seeing the peace in Draco's face. She held him tight, wishing for the danger to go away. But she knew that she had lost and she would be giving him up. The front that she fought so hard to maintain broke. Her whole body quavered as silent tears fell from her eyes.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3 - Bloodline**

"Are you certain this leads to her?" Narcissa felt the outline of the ring wrapped in silk that she held in her hand. The defeat in her voice was evident. She took off the mask of strength that she wore the night before, letting Severus see how weary she truly was.

"I arranged everything to go perfectly. Just Apparate back to the Manor after you have accomplished your mission." Severus gave Narcissa a questioning look. "Not so fierce today, are we?"

"Not in front of you. It gets too tiring to keep up such acts," Narcissa sighed.

"Stay strong."

"I will." In the blink of an eye, Narcissa's perfect stance was back and all signs of vulnerability were gone. "When will the Dark Lord return?"

"You have forty-eight hours. Do try to finish everything before then. Remember that aside from caring for your son while you are away, arranging that Portkey was the last thing I could help you with. Now, I must await the Dark Lord's return." Severus' gaze was stern and the intensity in his eyes presented the true weight of his reminders.

"Wait for Draco to awaken and make him drink a dreamless sleeping draught. He must stay in his room at all times. He must not wake while I am out." Her voice was uncompromising, mirroring the austerity of Severus.

"I am aware. Be careful."

"I cannot thank you enough." Narcissa looked into Severus' eyes as she removed the silk that housed the ring. Once the ring touched her skin, she felt the pulling sensation that one gets while travelling via Portkey. She closed her eyes to brace herself for the battle she was going to have in a few moments.

She arrived at her desired location. She carefully surveyed the house in front of her. It was situated near the edge of a cliff. It was where the cerulean of the sky met the turquoise of the sea. She was astonished by her sister's choice of location. Maybe it was Ted's decision, but something told her that it was Andromeda who opted to live in such a place. Andromeda's home reminded her of Beachy Head, a place they frequented before all three sisters went to Hogwarts. She remembered the emerald green grass they rolled on while their parents were not looking and the differently-hued exquisite flowers, used to crown their heads, that they had made to bloom with raw magic. She longed for those days in her youth when, in their own world, there were no Dark Arts, Mudbloods or Blood-traitors, only three beautiful girls who loved each other dearly.

It was still dark when she left the Manor so when she reached her destination, a beautiful sunrise welcomed her. The majestic sight soothed her nerves and calmed her mind. She took it as a sign that maybe, just maybe, her plan would work. She let herself be engrossed in the beautiful surroundings. She longed for the hum of birds and for the feel of the warm rays of the sun against her face. She allowed herself a small smile. She composed herself and walked towards the door. Before she was able to knock, she met the surprised expression of a fair-haired, big-bellied man.

Ted Tonks' kindness was always present in his eyes and his stance. He had a warm aura that radiated to those near him, making them want to get closer to him. His face bore many lines from his repeated smiles. Anger was an emotion foreign to his sweet, kind face. It surprised him when rage filled his heart upon seeing the woman that stood on their doorway.

Ted Tonks was shocked and raised his wand against Narcissa. She was so struck by the suddenness of the action, she wasn't able to do anything.

"Why are you here?" Ted yelled with ferocity. He examined Narcissa's face and for a moment, confusion colored his expression.

"I mean no harm, Ted." Narcissa kept her head high and stared into the man's eyes.

"Leave now." He kept his wand raised at Narcissa.

"I need to speak to my sister." Narcissa looked at him pleadingly.

"This is your last warning." The man stepped forward causing Narcissa to take a step back and fall.

"I need to speak to my sister. Please, Ted. Please." Narcissa tried to keep the fire in her but instead, tears fell and she broke into a sob.

There was something in Narcissa's eyes that reminded him of his wife. It was Bellatrix that almost shared the face of his wife but those sad, pleading sapphires seem to speak to his soul, wounding him with his wife's pained look.

Unsettled, Ted called for Andromeda but did not let his guard down.

Andromeda Tonks née Black could pass as Bellatrix Lestrange's twin sister. There were a lot of similarities between them but the differences were more striking. Instead of the screaming madness that could be found in Bellatrix's eyes, Andromeda's were full of love and kindness. Like her husband, Andromeda also radiated compassion but the signature nobleness of the Black family stayed with her through the years.

"Why, darling? You sound like…" Andromeda wasn't able to finish her sentence as her gaze fell to her sister on the ground. "Help her up, Ted." Andromeda's voice was stern, gone was the warmth in her eyes. "Why are you here?" Andromeda pressed.

"I need your help." Narcissa's voice trembled and her hands shook as she spoke.

"Drop your wand, Ted." Andromeda stared at her husband. Ted threw her a questioning look but ended up lowering his wand.

"Come in." Andromeda remained cold as she gestured for Narcissa to enter her home. Andromeda motioned to a chair and asked her to sit. Andromeda found her way to a chair across her sister. "Ted, darling, please make us some tea." Narcissa glanced at Andromeda's husband. Upon her gaze, Ted left the room.

There was a great unrest stirring inside Narcissa. It has been years since she last saw Andromeda and she did not know what to read from her sister's calm demeanor. Narcissa's turmoil was evident. She failed to keep up her tough exterior upon her confrontation with Ted. Even the signature Black grace seemed to have left her for the time being. She wondered how she could ask Andromeda the greatest favor of helping her save her son. She doubted she needed to explain everything. Andromeda was affiliated with the Order of the Phoenix through her daughter. Narcissa was certain that she knew of their allegiance and of Draco's failure. Narcissa took a few deep breaths to help compose herself but her burden was too heavy and her worries too great.

"'Dromeda, dearest sister, the same blood runs through our veins…" Narcissa whispered.

"Now that you are in need, we are suddenly related again?" Andromeda narrowed her eyes.

Narcissa walked to Andromeda and reached for her hand. "I never stopped being your sister. I love you, Andromeda, despite the fact that there is this unbelievably huge gap between us. I love you despite the years we spent not talking to each other. I love you even though you turned your back from us. I love you, 'Dromeda. I know you do not see it, and I have not been given the chance to express it, but I love you."

"I thought you resented me too, for marrying Ted." Andromeda looked away, shame filling her heart and tears flowing from her eyes.

"No, 'Dromeda." Narcissa shook her head. "I do not. I never did. I never will…but I had to sever my connections with you or else our family would have disinherited me as well. I was young. I could not even imagine the indignities of losing our name. It is not that you are of lesser importance, not that at all. Our ways were the only ones I knew. I could not imagine living any other way. Also, I could not leave our mother. Despite her imperfections, I was certain she loved me dearly. I could not break her heart. I am sorry."

It took a while before Andromeda answered. She thought that through her marriage with Ted, she had lost not only her name but also her family. Apparently, she was able to keep Narcissa. "Forgive me if you felt like I have abandoned you. I love you, too. You were, you are and will always be my little Cissy." Andromeda gave her sister a warm hug.

Andromeda let Narcissa go and looked into her eyes. "What is causing your strife? I know you may not resent me deep in your heart but something must be terribly wretched for you to grace my home."

"Draco…" Narcissa felt relieved that she had been reunited with her sister. She was happy that she gained back a part of her family but it made her terribly scared. It terrified her that the world would take Draco away now that it gave Andromeda back. This thought shook her. She sobbed uncontrollably.

"Breathe, Cissy. Breathe." Andromeda ran her hands along her sister's back.

"The Da-dark Lord—" Narcissa hiccupped. "wi-ill ki-kill him." Narcissa desperately wanted to explain but her sobs were overpowering her voice.

"But Dumbledore is dead."

"Y-you know it—" Narcissa slurred– "wa-was not Dra-draco's doing." Narcissa's words were almost incomprehensible. She just cried and cried helpless tears for a few short moments, but that small lapse of time seemed an eternity to her older sister.

"I know that much."

"I thou-thought Du-dumbledore's death—" Narcissa stuttered still – "w-would be e-enough to sa-save my s-son." Narcissa gasped for air and then wailed, "It is my fault!" It seemed that not stammering took all of her. Narcissa started hyperventilating.

It pained Andromeda to watch her sister in such despair. She wanted to help but she knew she couldn't if she wasn't aware of the circumstance.

"Accio calming draught." In an instant, the vial of potion was in her hands. "Cissy, drink this. I need to understand."

Narcissa's whole body was trembling. The glass container almost fell to the floor. Andromeda put the bottle to her sister's lips and made her drink.

Andromeda waited. She held her sister to ease her quavering. She wished for the potion to take its effect already. She was not used to seeing her sister so broken, so human. Never had Narcissa Malfoy been anything less than regal in her adult life. It stunned Andromeda and it dawned on her how arduous the affliction was.

Narcissa's breathing started to return to normal. Tears still escaped her eyes but oh-so-silently. The grace that she always carried crept to her consciousness. Everything seemed ordinary except for the drops of pearl running down Narcissa's face and the shaking of her hands that gave away her inner turmoil.

Andromeda squeezed her sister's hand to help ease the trembling. "What do you want me to do?"

"Let me save my boy, 'Dromeda. Let me correct my errors as a mother. Let me. Help me. Please, dearest sister. I beseech you. Let my beloved boy experience the truth and the world as you see it. We blinded him. We did not show him anything but our side. Andromeda, help him open his eyes and see without the prejudices that were instilled into his being. I beg of you, please." Narcissa burst as her emotions flowed from her chest. By the end of her words, her tears were yet again, flowing like a river.

"You are asking too much, Cissy." Andromeda slowly walked away from Narcissa. She felt her sister's anguish and dire need, but she could not allow herself to help her.

Narcissa inhaled and fixed her eyes on her sister. "Please, 'Dromeda. Please. You have a daughter. I know, even in the smallest corner of your heart, you would understand me. You are a mother."

"Do not tell me, never tell me that I could understand you, because I would never sacrifice my child for any gain! Never, Narcissa! Never!" Andromeda paused and searched in her sister's eyes. "I will die first before I let anyone damage my child the way your way of life and your beliefs destroyed yours."

"Kill me if you must. Just save him." Narcissa held her sister's gaze and in that moment, despair left her and she let it be displaced by pure conviction. She had nothing to lose anymore. If she lost Draco, nothing would matter. Even if her heart continued to beat, she would be merely a body without a soul and a spirit.

Narcissa's words astounded Andromeda, which left her with her eyes wide and her mouth open. Quickly, she composed herself and walked to her sister. "Cissy…"

"'Dromeda, please. I have a plan and it could not work without you. Please. I know I am not the best mother so help, help me become better. Help me save my son!" Narcissa wailed.

Andromeda grasped her sister's hand. "Tell me what I must do."

"Please, 'Dromeda. Please!" Narcissa continued to cry. She did not realize what her sister just said. When she understood, she gaped at Andromeda and asked, "Pardon?"

Andromeda squeezed her sister's hand and gently repeated, "Tell me what I must do."

Narcissa sobbed, and despite her sister's hold, her whole body still shuddered. Her tears still poured like rain but she was not in anguish anymore. She cried because of gratitude and of hope. Her sister's willingness to help consoled her. The greater possibility of Draco being saved alleviated the weight of the world on her shoulders. She wept until she had no tears to shed. She held her sister tightly in her arms. Once she had collected herself, she proceeded to tell her sister her plans.


	4. Chapter 4

Hello lovelies! Finally, you guys will meet Hermione. This is one of the chapters that I just wrote recently because I realized that the beginning of the story focused too much on Draco and it took too many chapters before Hermione's appearance. This chapter is important and you will soon find out why! Reviews are really loved, thank you so much!

**Chapter 4 - Unremembered **

Hermione gently closed the wooden doors without a sound. Not even the hum of her breathing could be heard. She took measured steps on the path to the white-washed picket fence. She swallowed, but she felt like something was blocking her throat, a warning that tears would soon escape her eyes. She decided to stop midway to admire the lawn and the flower beds that both her parents tended well. She also watched as the tall trees and petite bushes seemed to sway with the wind. In that moment, she realized that staying was too hard, too painful. She decided to run, to escape the home she knew all her life as soon as she possibly could.

It hurt her, pained her more than she could have imagined, thinking that she would forevermore remember her parents and, on the other hand, she would not cross their mind at all. While she could drown in nostalgia and wallow in longing, they would never know that she ever existed at all. It was a difficult decision, probably the most grueling choice she had to make in her life. Especially that it was she who chose for them, that she used her judgment to ascertain their future. What assurance did she have that she did the right thing? She thought about it, lost sleep because of it, and devoted countless hours of research for it. She was positive that she did things correctly. She read all the books about memory modifications known to man. Despite the success of what she had done, she still doubted if it was really the right thing to do.

She wanted them safe; to be in a place that was free from war, liberated from Voldemort's grasp. To do that, she modified their memories without their permission. She took away years worth of her presence and memories from their lives. Although she tried to preserve their traits, likes and dislikes. She did not change anything that did not concern her. They were still dentists, and behind the new names, they still bore the same faces and the same personalities. She decided that it was the best thing to do, that it was the only choice. But the guilt of taking too much from them was crippling her almost literally.

She ran despite the trembling of her body. She needed to get away. She was afraid that if she stayed, she would undo the memory charm. She started to cry. Breathing started to be a challenge. Still, she forced herself to dash and abandon what she had always known all her life. She laughed. She imagined she looked like a maniac. It was not really her who was leaving. Her parents were deserting everything, even their own daughter, all because of her own doing. She sobbed so hard, people were already staring. She stopped to catch her breath and to rest her buckling knees.

She had no destination in mind. She just wanted to find a dark place where she could Disapparate. In two weeks time, she was supposed to go to the Burrow. A part of her wanted to go the Burrow earlier, but there was so much family in that place, she didn't think she'd be able to stand it. A few days ago, she decided to owl Tonks and ask her if she could stay at their place until the agony of what she had done ebbed away.

A few steps after halting from her exhausting run, she found a dark alley. She looked around, made sure that no one was there to witness her vanish into thin air. When she was certain that she was alone, she held her wand so tight she feared it was going to break, and pictured her destination in her mind. She felt herself being pulled into her wand, into an immense black hole. She felt her insides spinning as if she was no more.

She almost fell to her knees. She could still feel the weakness her sprint had brought. She took a few moments before she examined where she had landed. She let her eyes wander and realized that she was too distraught to Apparate properly. From a distance, she could see an old castle. She had heard Tonks tell stories about it but the details seemed to escape her mind. She scanned the landscape once more and found the house that she had been looking for. It was still far from her but she did not mind a little walk. She needed to clear her head anyway.

Hermione counted her steps: one, two, three, four, five, six… But she never reached thirty. She was so distressed and so flummoxed by her own thoughts, that her brain already lost the capacity to count continuously. She would start again at one, and after reaching twenty-three, twenty-four, twenty-five, her wits would lose its power and she would have to start back from one again.

After what seemed like days, she was near enough to the house. She closed her eyes for a while and inhaled deeply, taking in the beauty of the paradise. She painted a picture of the place in her mind. The golden sun that gave light to everything that it touched, the vast azure sky that was illuminated by it, and the infinite blue sea that glistened as if diamonds were buried deep within. She loved a lot of places but this haven was different. Maybe it was because of the turmoil in her life that she considered this place a sanctuary. She slowly exhaled. She took another deep breath, taking with it the splendor of everything.

When Hermione opened her eyes, she caught a glimpse of a familiar, gorgeous woman with snowy skin and flowing flaxen hair, in an elegant black robe and grasping her wand. Hermione raised her own wand and yelled, "Stupefy!" but in the next moment, the woman had disappeared into oblivion, leaving the blast of red to vanish into nothingness.

"Tonks! Tonks! Tonks! Narcissa! Narcissa Malfoy was here! Is everyone —" She gasped at the sight of Andromeda Tonks crying while she was being held by her husband. "Okay." She was unable to keep herself from uttering the last two syllables of her statement. The husband and wife stared at her. She looked at her feet. "Good afternoon. I am Hermione Granger. I am a friend of Nymphadora Tonks. Erm.. Narcissa Malfoy was here. Are you okay? I tried to Stupefy her but I was too late. I am sorry."

"There is nothing to worry about Miss Granger. Everything is fine. My wife here is just… sad." Ted looked at his wife empathetically and held her tighter. "Do make yourself comfortable. We've already arranged a room for you upstairs."

Hermione was, at best, perplexed with all that had happened. First, her parents, albeit unknowingly, had lost their daughter. Second, she opted to stay at the Tonks' place instead of the Burrow. Third, she saw Narcissa Malfoy leave it. Fourth, she found Andromeda Tonks crying mere moments after. She did not know how to feel or think about any of it. She climbed the stairs and decided to find solace under the covers of her bed. She opted to sleep rather than to stay up and wait for Tonks. She wanted to avoid her overstimulated brain while awake. She didn't want to over-think or to bask in her miseries. She also did not want the mystery that was Narcissa Malfoy lurking in her mind. She closed her eyes and let her mind be surrounded by nothingness. 

Hermione did not realize that falling asleep would mean nightmares. She dreamt of her parents, in the beautiful place of Sydney, Australia. She had never been there, but she had read enough for it to be real in her mind. In her dream, they were just like any tourists, wearing matching summer shirts and shorts. They were wearing their favorite sunglasses and white hats to protect themselves from the heat of the sun. They were awed by the beauty of the place. She saw genuine smiles on their faces. They wanted a souvenir, so they looked around to find someone that would take their picture together. Her parents found a man, wearing a dark hood and an ivory mask. At that moment, Hermione wanted to yell at them, but in her dream, she had no voice. The man took the camera, waited for her parents to smile, then he took out his wand and yelled with a joyous voice, as if attempting to mock her, "Avada Kedavra!" In the next moment, her parents were on the floor, staring into space and lifeless.

She was so terrified. All of a sudden, she had lost the distinction between dreams and reality. She was not so sure she was only in the world of her thoughts. Her eyes were fixed on her parents' unmoving bodies. She neared them and tried to move them but nothing happened. She hugged them and shed desperate tears.

She felt her body shake, then the whole world quavered. She opened her eyes, and there was only the room she previously entered. There was no Australia, no Death Eaters and no dead parents. Her face was still wet from her tears and all the pain that she felt. She was now aware that she had a nightmare. She was so stunned by the horridness of it all, she was not able to take in anything from the real world. She just stared blankly while sobbing as if there was no tomorrow.

"Hermione, it was just a dream. Hush now." Tonks hugged Hermione and kissed the top of her head.

She looked at the woman who held her. It took a while before she was able to recognize who she was. When she was certain that it was a friend, she cried even harder. "The-they were de-dead." It took every ounce of strength she had to utter those three words. She wanted to say more but her body could only take so much.

"It was just a dream, my dear. I am here now. I will not let anyone hurt you."

"No, no, no. Not me. M-my pa-parents." Hermione stuttered.

"_Accio_ Calming Draught." Tonks waited for the vial to be in her hand, then continued. "You have to drink this, Hermione. I need to know what's frightening you so I can help you, okay?"

"O-okay." Hermione drank the potion and felt her whole body relax a little. Her breathing slowed and the quavering of her body ceased. She let a few moments pass before she continued. She waited for her heart to stop beating so wildly. She put her hand on her chest as she waited.

"Better? Now, could you tell me?" Tonks' eyes did not leave Hermione's. Tonks really wanted to understand what was happening to her young friend.

Hermione nodded her head and said, "Tonks, I did something. I modified my parents' memories and sent them to Australia. I am terrified of what Voldemort will do to them if he finds them. I just don't want them to suffer. I want them to be safe."

"Were they aware?"

"N-no." Hermione's voice and lips started to tremble. She inhaled slowly, afraid that she would have another panic attack.

"Calm down, Hermione." Tonks held her tighter. "I understand. You wanted them to be safe. Sometimes, we just do what we have to do. Once all of this is over, after you've explained, they will realize that."

"You're certain?" Hermione gazed at Tonks with pleading eyes.

"Positive." Tonks smiled at her and held her hand.

"Erm, Tonks… I need to tell you something." Hermione looked away from Tonks, anxious of her response.

"There is more?" Tonks raised her eyebrow.

"Erm… Yeah, but not about me anymore," Hermione murmured.

"What is it, Hermione?" Tonks asked. She was curious. She wanted to find out what was causing Hermione's troubles aside from her parents.

"This afternoon, I saw Narcissa Malfoy outside your house." She paused, uncertain of how she would continue. After a few seconds and one deep breath, she carried on. "I panicked, and when I entered your home, I found your mother crying. I asked what was wrong, but your father said that she was just sad."

"The Blacks are not that easy to decipher. I would like to think that I know my mother, but there are times that she completely astounds me." Tonks gave Hermione a small smile, "Don't worry too much, Hermione. You've got too much on your mind already."

"Just make sure she's okay."

"Of course, I will. You need to rest again. Just summon a vial of Dreamless Sleep Potion if you don't want any nightmares anymore. I will just go check on my mother." Tonks kissed Hermione's forehead. She almost cringed, for it brought back memories of the nights when it was her mother and father kissing her goodnight.

Hermione was too stubborn to want the nightmares to go away. She wanted no horrors, but in the back of her mind and in the depths of her heart, she felt like she deserved it. She was also afraid that if the bad dreams ceased, she would stop thinking about her parents. She feared that they would be buried deeper and deeper in her head, and there would come a time that they would not exist to her anymore. She held on to the horrors as badly as she clung to their wonderful memories. As the door closed, she rested her eyes and wished that her slumber be a restful one. 

Tonks had heard the story of her mother's estrangement from the Black family countless times. She heard it from neighbors, from classmates in Hogwarts and from friends, but never from her own parents. She had never heard her mother speak ill of her family or speak of them entirely. When she was younger, she used to wonder why. There was a time when she asked her mother, and all she got was a stern look coupled with silence, which to her, equaled being screamed at. She never dared to inquire about it again, even as a grown woman. But now, the situation required it, and she was dead nervous about asking. Nymphadora Tonks was a brave woman, but her mother had a look that never failed to make her cringe.

She quietly left Hermione's room and searched for her mother in the house. She first checked her mother and father's bedroom, but only her father was there, snoring quite loudly. She quietly closed the door then proceeded to the kitchen. Andromeda Tonks loved tea, so it was not a surprise that Tonks found her there. From a short distance, she could see her mother wiping tears with an embroidered handkerchief.

"Is something wrong?" She slowly approached Andromeda and touched her shoulder.

"Nothing is wrong, my daughter." Andromeda forced a smile.

"Is that water on your eyes?" Tonks raised an eyebrow.

"I am conflicted, torn between being happy and sad." Andromeda poured herself a cup of tea and then led her daughter to the dining table. She took a seat and sipped her tea.

"May I ask what is making my beautiful mother weep?" Tonks walked towards Andromeda and hugged her from the back.

"You know, you already did ask." Andromeda chuckled and wiped tears from the corner of her eyes.

Tonks took a seat across from her mother and gazed at her.

"Mother, Hermione told me Narcissa Malfoy was here." Tonks' tone was serious, but the concern was overflowing.

"You must not show disrespect to your aunt, Dora." Andromeda gave her daughter a stern look. Tonks almost cringed.

Tonks looked at her hands on the table and murmured, "I'm sorry." She took a deep breath. "Okay. So, Aunt Narcissa was here," Tonks said dryly. "What did she want?"

"She just needed help with Draco," Andromeda stated.

"But-"

"We are going to help her." Andromeda continued without giving her daughter a chance to finish.

"We?" Tonks was so astounded that, for a few seconds, she forgot to close her mouth.

"Yes. In a matter of days, Draco will be staying here," Andromeda declared.

"But he is a Death Eater!" Tonks protested.

"He is only a child that was scared into his decision." Andromeda shook her head, then continued. "Most of all, Draco is family, Dora."

"Tell me what's really going on, Mother."

"Narcissa," Andromeda stated. She sighed and said, "You know when you are certain you have lost something? I was sure I had lost everything that tied me to the Black family. It was my choice to leave, but that never meant they were not or they stopped being important. I do not regret choosing you and your father, but if I could have only kept both, I would." Andromeda trailed into silence.

Andromeda proceeded to tell the tale of a mother who would want to save her almost-fallen son from the wrath of her Lord. Andromeda shed silent tears, feeling compassion for her sister and for her nephew. Tonks held her mother. After a few moments, her eyes were glistening as well, and she felt empathy for a family she never believed she had.


	5. Chapter 5

Sorry it took too long for me to update! I am having some sort of dilemma with the chapters and with Draco! I am a wee bit panicked, actually! But here it is! I hope you like it! In this chapter, you will see how Narcissa decided to save Draco and a hint of where Draco will end up. Thank you for your patience and for the time you've given this story!

**Chapter 5 - Falling Off a Cliff**

Narcissa was full of apprehension when she returned to the Manor. She feared that the Dark Lord would already be back from his exploits and that the wooden door that protected Draco from the world would by now be broken down. She rushed as fast as she could. She was aware that it was unbecoming for a woman, and especially for a Malfoy, to run like a lunatic but she realized it was more unfitting for a mother to just let her son die. She was almost out of breath when she reached the entrance of Draco's room. Before entering, she took a few moments to inhale and exhale deeply to compose herself.

"Is he asleep?" Narcissa questioned, her elegant steps announcing her presence as she entered the room where Severus hid Draco.

"As you can see." His voice was unfeeling as he gestured his hand towards a sleeping Draco. Severus turned his back and walked towards the door.

"Do you think he could be saved?" Narcissa faced the man that she was eternally grateful for.

"His soul was already spared." Severus just looked at her coldly. The dark circles under his ebony eyes made his skin look ashen.

"No… Do you think he will live?" Her question was whisper. It seemed like she was almost afraid of the answer.

"There is always a way. Always." His tone was solemn, as if it was the most important thing his mouth had ever spoken.

"You have to assure me, Severus." Narcissa gazed at him pleadingly.

"You could not possibly believe that I could do that, Narcissa. I am not a seer. What I could do is remind you, with the words that came from your mouth, that you are a perceptive and powerful witch. I believe that is true. Use your talents. Most importantly, hold on to the love you have for your son. There are no limits to the things one does for love."

"Love, Severus? I did not know that about you." Narcissa gave him a small smile.

"Not perceptive enough, are we?" Severus smirked at her.

Narcissa dismissed him with a wave of her hand, a beam still painted on her face. "How many hours before he awakens?" Narcissa walked towards her son and sat on his bed.

"Three hours. Will that be enough?" Severus stopped his steps and looked at Narcissa.

"It will suffice." She looked at Draco and removed strands of blond hair from his forehead.

"I gather everything went well?"

"Perfectly." Narcissa smiled, not taking her eyes off her boy.

Severus nodded, even though he was aware that Narcissa was not looking at him. He took slow, gentle steps, afraid that he would disturb the peaceful moment between mother and son.

Narcissa raised her head and glanced around the room, making sure she was alone. She gazed at the tall floor-length windows that were draped with curtains of silver and green. It amused her how everything they owned, even the Malfoy crest, was branded by the house of Salazar Slytherin. It was a simple room, the simplest they had, maybe. Narcissa had asked Severus to keep her son in the most unnoticeable corner of the Manor and being the man Severus was, he followed her instructions to the letter.

She now proceeded to the tasks she had set for herself to save her son. In her mind, she listed the things that needed to be done. After mentally preparing herself for her undertakings, she carried on to performing them.

Without leaving her son's side, she whispered, "_Accio_ glass vials." She only had to wait a while before she caught the little bottles with her hand. Tears threatened to fall from her eyes. To ensure that her plans would not be disrupted by anyone and to assure the safety of her son, she murmured, _"Cave Inimicum." _

Narcissa took a few moments to breathe deeply and calm herself. When she was certain that all her unwarranted emotions were buried deep within her, she put the tip of her wand to her son's forehead. In an almost inaudible voice, she said, "I am sorry, Draco. I hope someday you will understand." With silent tears, she watched as wisps of silver left her son's temple. Carefully, she transferred them to the glass vials that she had summoned.

She whispered, "Darsha."

In an instant, a pop was heard and a three foot tall house-elf with bat-like ears, huge blue eyes and an even larger head appeared.

"Yes, Mistress?"

"I need you to get Thunder for me. Run a bath for the young master and prepare a feast for him. You shall serve him only the best. Bring everything here. No one must find out."

"Will my mistress be needing quills and parchments?"

"Ah, yes. Thank you, Darsha."

The house-elf bowed and Disapparated with a pop. Narcissa walked to the desk near the window and found sheets of parchment and a set of quills on it. She sat on the chair and wrote her letter. Afterwards, she stared at it and read what she had written.

"Dearest Sister,

If I do not see the end of it, be the one to show him his memories. Although I am hoping, with all of me, that I will be with him when he remembers."

Narcissa sealed the letter with the Malfoy Crest. She heard a gentle tapping on the window and she saw her dignified great grey owl. She opened the window and the owl's big head, grey face and yellow eyes greeted her. It landed on the desk and gently nibbled her finger. She attached the paper to its leg and secured the glass vials with it. Narcissa whispered "Thunder, my dear, bring this to Andromeda Tonks. Take excellent care of what I will be taking away from my Draco."

She watched as the owl flew away with her son's past. Her eyes were fixed on the majestic flying creature until it was out of sight. She let her gaze linger on the horizon for a little while. She breathed in and welcomed the inevitable. She walked towards Draco's bed and lovingly touched his cheek.

"My darling boy, wake up."

Draco was still groggy. It did not surprise him due to the massive amount of Dreamless Sleep Potion that Snape made him drink. It disturbed him that upon his waking for the past hours, it was his professor's face that he saw. It made him feel secure that it was his mother's voice this time. Slowly, he opened his eyes.

"Is it all over now, Mother?"

"Not yet, son, but it will be soon."

"I am going to die, Mother. Aren't I?"

"No, no, no," Narcissa whispered while she held her son. "I will never let that happen, not while I am still breathing."

Draco sat up. "But he is going to kill me. If you defend me, you will suffer. Let me die, Mother. Let me expiate for our sins. Maybe if he took my life, he will leave you and Father alone." He stood and walked away from his mother. He was being a hero, a Gryffindor, but he was a Slytherin. It scared him but his life was the best he could offer to save them.

"No deaths will be necessary, my son," Narcissa assured Draco.

"Mother, let me. Let me save you and father from the Dark Lord's wrath. If I die for you, my life and my death would mean something."

"Even if you do not do that, your life already means something." Narcissa paused then added, "It means everything to me."

"Your life also means as much. So let me die with the knowledge that because of my death, I spared you. I cannot let you save me when it will endanger you, Mother."

"It is not I…"

"Mother?"

"It is not I who will do the saving. Just trust me."

Draco wanted to believe his mother but he knew it was not possible that no life be given up. In the Dark Lord's world, murders were always an inevitability and sadly, even though the Manor was their home, it has become his castle where he was running his empire. Lucius was no longer the man of the house. They all existed to serve Him. Still, he decided to indulge his mother and ask, "How could that be possible?"

"It just is."

"I don't think I understand."

"It is not your place to understand." Narcissa paused then continued, "In an hour, we are leaving. Do not, I repeat, do not leave this room. If you need anything, summon Darsha. Your bath is ready. She will be here soon with your meal. Eat well, my son. I will be back in an hour to collect you."

"Where are we going, Mother?"

"Just trust me, Draco. Do not ask any more questions. One hour. Set your affairs in order."

The finality in Narcissa's voice was laced with apprehension when she finished speaking, but Draco trusted his mother. His heart was pounding and he was beginning to sweat profusely. He denied the obvious signs of turmoil and proceeded to the bath.

Slowly, Draco took of his clothing one by one. He gently untied his charcoal robes and let them slide off from his body. Next, he undid the buttons of his pitch-black trousers and let them fall to the floor. He tested the temperature of the bath with his fingertips. It was perfect. He let his body submerge in the foamy perfection, part by part: first his legs, then his trunk, then the rest of his body. He held his breath and he let himself be immersed completely underwater.

Draco did not really understand what his mother meant when she said 'set your affairs in order,' so he did not really do anything in that aspect. Although he dressed well, better than he usually did. He wore the grey dress robes which his mother loved because it brought out the grey in his eyes. Draco also summoned Darsha to find his silver ring which boasted a serpent, the symbol of his beloved house. He debated whether he'd bring his journal but decided not to because he assumed that if he would be going somewhere for a long time, her mother would ask him to pack.

He was ready before the hour his mother had given him. Darsha cooked a sumptuous meal for him. Her preparations were never disappointing but there was something different with each bite of the tender and juicy steak he had. The house-elf even outdid herself with the serving of the sweets. Darsha knew that he loved desserts but for his meal she had prepared almost all of the delicacies he could imagine, something that never happened - even during his birthday. He thought of getting another slice of devil's food cake when the wooden doors of his room opened.

"Draco, come now."

Draco desperately wanted to ask his mother where they were going but he knew that she was serious when she said, "Do not ask any more questions." He stayed quiet and complied. He matched the rushed pace of his mother. He nearly bumped into her when she suddenly halted.

"Cissy, where are you going?" A haunting screech broke the silent.

"We are leaving. I will explain when I get back."

"Are you going to do it?"

"I have no choice, do I?" Narcissa panicked.

"No! It will destroy you! Let me! It will be quick. I will be kind." Bellatrix walked towards Draco and attempted to pull him away from Narcissa.

"No! Do not touch my son! Just let us leave! I could not do it in our own home. It would haunt me forever. Please, just let us leave."

"No, Cissy, I can't. You might not do it."

"Do you not trust me? I am most loyal to the Dark Lord."

"No, Cissy,_ I_ am most loyal to the Dark Lord. You, on the other hand, are most loyal to your love for Draco. Let me do it."

"No!" Narcissa yelled. "_Stupefy!" _Narcissa gasped when she saw her sister tumble across the hall. "Forgive me Bella!" Narcissa took Draco's trembling hand and screamed, " Draco! Do not let go!"

There were a lot of people in this world that Draco Malfoy did not trust but his mother was not one of them. Despite the fact that his mother _Stupefied_ her sister and even though everything around him got more twisted, he took her arm. He was swallowed by an absolute darkness and the familiar sensation of Apparition took over.

It was a beautiful place, a paradise. It never occurred to him how lovely this place was. His mother brought him to the Beachy Head. Draco took a few moments to take in the beauty that was before him. He breathed in deeply and listened to his mother speak.

"The Black family used to go here all the time, Draco. I think I brought you here only once, when you were a little boy. I was not able to do it again because going here without my sisters pained me so much. It is such a shame that you were not able to enjoy it as much as I did." Sadness and longing were evident in her voice.

"We could always come back, Mother." Draco reassured Narcissa.

"Perhaps." She gave him a small smile.

"Why did you bring me here?"

"So we could both marvel at its beauty. I had my most wonderful memories here as a child. You are not a child anymore but still…"

"Why are you crying, Mother?"

"It is nothing, my son." Narcissa gave her son a small smile and uttered, "_Expecto Patronum!_"

Narcissa and Draco watched as a majestic, glittering-white and translucent wolf was produced from the tip of her wand. They were both left in awe by its majesty. The sun was almost setting when Narcissa conjured the corporeal Patronus, so the grand, dazzling wolf illuminated the sky. Mother and son watched until it disappeared into oblivion.

"I thought you could not conjure a Patronus?"

"It just takes the most powerful and happiest memory."

Draco threw his mother a quizzical look. "What is yours, then?"

"You." Narcissa smiled at her son and continued. "Walk towards the end of the cliff, my darling boy."

"Why, Mother?"

"Just trust me."

"I am going to die, aren't I?" Draco asked. "You are going to kill me," he whispered, almost to himself.

In that moment, Draco was certain he was going to die. He did not know what hurt more, the thought of his death fast approaching or that his own mother would be the one to kill him. It made all of him ache horribly but he did not feel betrayed. After all, he deserved it. It was even he who suggested it. Maybe his mother never even considered murdering him before he opened his stupid mouth. But he understood, really understood, he deserved to die and his mother was only saving him from possible torment. At least, his mother would be gentle and death would come easily. And maybe if he died, his life could finally be worth something. His death would be payment for all the faults that the Malfoys had committed against the Dark Lord. After his sacrifice, maybe, just maybe, the Dark Lord will let his parents be. He closed his eyes and accepted his fate.

"Just trust me."

"_Confundo._" Narcissa walked towards Draco and inserted something into his robes. She kissed Draco on his forehead and looked into his eyes.

She took small and slow steps away from him, her eyes not leaving his. "_Obliviate_." Narcissa took a deep breath as tears escaped her eyes. "May the memories I took away pave the way for better ones. I love you, son. _Stupefy!" _A flash of red light hurled itself towards Draco, lodging him off the cliff.

"_Wingardium Leviosa_," a voice whispered.

I would like to thank my lovely and wonderful betas – Ariana, Daena and Eliza. Thank you guys for reading my story and for spending time on it. I hope you would continue reading it. Reviews are loved, I mean REALLY! Let me hear what you think! Once again, thanks!


	6. Chapter 6

I originally wanted to wait for my betas to send me the latest corrections but I feel so bad for always making you guys wait. So, here it is. Finally, finally, finally, you will find out about Draco's fate.

Chapter 6 – Not So Blissful Ignorance

"What do you remember?"

He did not understand how or why, but his whole body hurt like he had been trampled by a troll. He had a splitting headache that made him want to down a gallon of Draught of Living Death and sleep for all eternity. Troll? Draught of Living Death? What in the world would those things be? He brushed the thoughts away.

He had just been woken up-rudely, if he might add-from a deep slumber and did not really understand the question of the unknown person talking to him. He chose to ignore the question and closed his eyes. He willed himself to go back to sleep, but the unfamiliar woman touched his arm and tried to shake him. He refused to open his eyes despite regaining consciousness, but she would not budge.

"Wake up, Draco."

Draco? Who was that? Thinking that she was making a mistake, he chose to face away from the woman and hide his face under a pillow.

"I need you to wake up, Draco."

He was really in pain and he was not in the mood to converse with a stranger. He heard that name again. Draco. Really, who was this Draco? Why was she calling him with that name? Didn't she know that he was-

With a jerk, he opened his eyes and sat up. He saw a reflection on the window of the room. It was strange because he knew it must be his own grey eyes staring back at him. But it was odd. He felt like he was an alien to himself. Who was he? Why does he not remember anything? Or does he? Where was he? Who was this human being?

In that moment, it dawned on him that he did not remember anything. He knew nothing. He pressed his palms against his temples, willing the information to come out, but his actions only augmented the physical pain he was feeling.

"Nothing, I remember nothing." Draco sighed and asked, "Who are you?"

Draco stared at the woman. His eyes trailed from the crown of her head to her neck. He took notice of her curly brown hair and the porcelain skin of her face and neck. He looked at his hand and observed that they shared the same milky color. He wondered and tried to rummage through the seemingly empty corners of his mind. He thought and he thought while he kept his mouth shut. After all, it was not wise to talk to a strange person. He inched away from her, narrowed his eyes and repeated, "Who are you?"

"I am your aunt. I am Andromeda Tonks." Andromeda smiled at him and touched his hand.

There was something familiar about the woman. Her face stirred fear in him but as he stared into her auburn eyes, he felt like they were out of place. Those warm and loving russet eyes do not belong to that face, Draco thought. He let himself be lost in her brown eyes and bask in the peculiar familiarity he was feeling towards the stranger.

"If you are my aunt, where is my mother?" He stared at her hand on his and brushed it away.

"Your mother sent you here."

"Didn't you hear me?" Draco inhaled. "I did not ask what she did. I asked where she is." Draco jeered.

"I am afraid I cannot tell you." Draco could almost feel the sadness in Andromeda's voice. It seemed to him that she wanted to help enlighten him but someone or something was preventing her from doing so.

If there was nothing in his past that he could remember, what did that make him? A nobody, he thought. He would just be an insignificant human being, unremembered and unimportant to all. He couldn't allow that to happen. He needed to find out. "Why can't I remember anything?"

"Your mother Obliviated you." Andromeda explained.

"Obliviate?" Draco murmured, almost to himself. He did not understand what that meant, although it was oddly familiar. He repeated it, this time, louder and with a questioning tone. "Obliviate?"

"She erased your memories. All of them, apparently, because you cannot remember even your name."

Draco's eyes flew open. He tried to repeat in his head what his supposed aunt said. My mother erased my memories. All of them. She did not even give me the dignity of knowing my own name, he thought. His heart was devoid of all emotions. Maybe his mother also took that away from him. He decided to clutch his chest and check if his heart was still beating. Maybe he was dead and this was all a sick joke from the afterlife.

He put his hands to his chest and he felt something inside of his robe. He took the thing out and stared at it. He looked at the portrait for a while. He saw his face, his eyes full of joy although the picture was partly ruined by drops of crimson. Beside him, a woman was embracing him with as much happiness, if not more, on her face. She shared the snowy skin of Draco and his supposed aunt and had eyes like the ocean. He took his gaze off the portrait and glanced at his aunt, searching for an explanation.

Draco did not understand why, but he knew. He knew that woman holding him in the photograph was his mother. Despite his certainty, he decided to ask his aunt. After all, he did not remember anything. "Is this her?"

Andromeda brushed the picture with her fingertips. She smiled and looked at it dotingly. Andromeda gazed at his eyes and whispered, "You were adorable as a boy." She sighed and added, "And yes, that is your mother, Narcissa."

"Is my mother dead?" He could feel the tears threatening to escape him. It was a pity that he wanted to grieve for a mother he did not remember, a mother who took away his memories. But there was something about those cobalt eyes and imagining them losing any trace of life that unsettled him to the core.

"No, Nephew. As of this moment, your mother is still alive." Andromeda shook her head.

"As of this moment?" Draco stood up and stared the woman down.

She looked up at Draco and said, "We are all in danger, my dear." Andromeda's words were foreboding.

Draco could feel a sense of doom but he refused to show any trace of apprehension. It did not matter to him that much anymore. He was nobody. There was nothing death could not take because his life meant nothing. He maintained defiance and hissed, "Why?"

"I am afraid I cannot tell you." Andromeda reached for Draco's hand. For three breaths he let her hold him, then pushed her hand away.

There was so much care embedded in the words Andromeda uttered. Draco was finding it hard to be angry. There was a moment of stillness within him before rage took over. It was not important that not knowing anything absolutely terrified him and that he yearned for some shelter. It did not matter how safe the woman made him feel. The only vital thing was that he felt lost and powerless so he needed to demonstrate fury to hide his weaknesses. He fought, he was not sure who exactly he was waging a war against but his aunt was the only one there. He yelled, "You have no right to do this to me!"

"I suggest you sit down." Draco remained standing. Andromeda threw Draco a piercing look. "Now."

A feeling of terror washed over him when his aunt lost the motherly atmosphere that had calmed him down just moments ago.

"No yelling will be done in my house, Draco. Understand?" Andromeda's voice was stern and it was clear that the rules of her house should not be bent.

Draco nodded his head. He realized that resistance will get him nowhere. He did not want to test his aunt's patience any further. He was a little afraid but he was determined to get what he wanted, to get himself back. If it meant he had to succumb to this woman and play by her rules, he would. Draco decided to play nice.

"Please, Aunt. Please tell me all that I should know." Draco used the most pleading voice he could manage.

The tranquility that momentarily left Andromeda in the face of Draco's defiance was back. In her mind, she gathered all the things that she could tell Draco and explained to him patiently. "All that you have to know is that your mother loves you so much, she is willing to endure the pain of being apart from you in this chaos to ensure your safety."

"Surely, you do not expect me to be amenable to just that? You do not suppose I will prance in this life without a single idea of who I am, right?"

"Your mother and I are both hoping that you will find out who you really are."

"You must understand. I need some… background." Draco was starting to panic. He was losing every strand of hope to find out all about his past. His voice quavered but he continued, "What would I be without my memories? How would I know about my mistakes, my joys and my pains? Where would I learn from? Where do I get my strength? How would I be reminded of my resilience? What am I without my past? " Draco exhaled and declared. "Nothing. Absolutely nothing."

Andromeda took Draco's hands and held them firmly. She looked into his storm-like eyes. "Without your past, you are still you, my nephew." Andromeda paused without taking her gaze off Draco. "Couldn't you make new mistakes and experience a different kind of joy and pain? You have your life and you are free to live it however you want. Isn't that what's most essential?"

Draco looked down and murmured, "You do not understand."

Andromeda held his chin and said, "I understand how important it is for you to make the most out of what your mother has given. She took your memories so you could have a clearer view of the world. She was afraid that what you learned may have clouded your vision. There is a proper time for you to have them back."

"When would that be?" He was hoping that Andromeda's answer would be "tomorrow."

"When you have already found who you really are." Andromeda smiled.

Disappointment overtook him. He was out of words so he nodded.

"Do not search for your past, Draco. Your mother did what she did to save you from it. Your memories will be given back at the proper time. Do not rush it. Consider this as you being reborn. Now, you are given an opportunity to live as you see fit, not constrained by anything. You are free."

If this was freedom, Draco did not want it. There was nothing but silence after his aunt uttered her words. She slowly sat up from the chair and walked towards the door. Draco was just beginning to settle down on his bed when he heard the door open. It was his aunt. Draco sighed.

Andromeda elegantly entered his room. Why his aunt must retain composure in his distress, he did not really understand. He sighed again and glanced at the door. "Nephew, you cannot leave your room. I need to settle some things first. I will collect you once everything is fixed. I will lock it. You seem too stubborn for your own good, my dear."

Before he was able to say anything, the door was already shut. He walked towards it and tried to turn the knob but it would not move. He yelled, "Aunt Andromeda!" But it seemed that he could not be heard by anything or anyone outside the door. Defeated, he walked towards his bed. He lay there, contemplating on the things he knew and trying to remember the things he should.

Apparently, in this world where he did not remember an ounce of reality about himself, freedom meant not being able to leave the room. Not only that, it meant that the door was going to be locked as well. He did not have the fight in him anymore. He was too exhausted. The pain that was forgotten crept into his consciousness and threatened to make him collapse on the floor. He fought against it. He was already a nobody; he definitely would not allow himself to be a weakling as well. His hands found the wall and he carefully led himself towards the bed.

He let out a sigh of relief upon reaching his destination. He lay down, took the portrait out of his robes and gazed at it. The stained picture was his only possession that linked him to his past. He stared at his mother, unaware of the proper thing to say. He laughed at himself. Losing one's memories made one crazy, he thought. He placed the portrait under his pillow. When he took his hand out, cold metal scratched his skin.  
>"Bloody hell!" He snarled.<p>

He looked at his hand and saw a ring on his finger. He inspected the silver serpent and the emerald eyes that adorned it. It was the first time that he noticed it. Funny, he thought. Maybe a ring becomes too mundane once you've lost everything else. He wondered what the significance of the ring was. He twisted it so that the serpent was inside his palm. He made a mental note to ask his aunt about it, hoping against hope that she would answer.

I would like to thank my lovely betas, the readers, especially the reviewers. I will try to upload another chapter before the holiday craze! Reviews are loved, always!


	7. Chapter 7

Hello lovelies! I am so sorry for uploading this late. There is a chapter that I inserted and I wanted to finish that first before uploading a new chapter. I hope you guys would enjoy this new chapter. Have fun!

Chapter 7 – The Man Behind the Door

When Hermione woke up and was greeted by that beautiful morning, she had almost forgotten that there was a war. It was one of those days when the sun gave light but not warmth, so she indulged herself with the comfort of her bed for a little while. Hermione buried herself in her blankets, willing to get lost in the wonders that surrounded her. But she was already awake and it was too late to put her mind back to rest.

She decided to get up and to admire the beauty of the place. She wanted to get lost for a few minutes, to steal some moments of reprieve from the wretchedness of war. She fixed her bed and went down to the kitchen. She made tea and waited for the pot to emit vapor. She inhaled, engrossing herself in the spicy and bitter aroma of Earl Grey. She poured herself a cup, got her coat and went outside.

It was barely after dawn. She could make out the ball of flame, emitting light from somewhere faraway. She was thankful for small blessings. She was grateful for the beauty of the place and for the almost non-existent warmth of the rays of the sun. She stared at the horizon as the teal sky was painted with shades of yellow. She admired the waters of the Strait of France, so blue, mirroring the magnificent sky. She let her eyes rest on the lighthouse, standing tall amidst waves of sapphire. She appreciated how it served as a beacon to seafarers, how it prevented ships and boats alike from getting lost. She wished for her very own guiding light, something or someone to help her survive the war so she could go back to her old life.

Her old life. Hermione sighed. She knew she was treading on dangerous waters the moment she realized she used old and life in the same sentence. It hurt her to no end to think about her past and look at her present. How her parents were still a part of her being even though they had no recollection of her. Small tears fell from her eyes. She wiped them with the back of her hand. Internally, she fought the sadness and the misery but tears still threatened her eyes.

She decided to whisper, "Hermione, you can do this." It didn't seem good enough. She was still unconvinced, still feeble. She repeated it, this time louder. "You can do this, Hermione." Tears were still looming in her eyes. She yelled, breaking the serenity of the surroundings, adding a flaw to the perfect paradise, "I can do this!"

In that moment, everything seemed to stop. The sun rose completely, engulfing her in its rays. She smiled and thanked the heavens for gifting her with a safe and picturesque haven. She let some moments pass. Then, she decided to go back to the house to do her duties and lose herself in an entirely different set of thoughts.

Bravery was something that Hermione knew she possessed. Hell, she was sorted into Gryffindor and that ought to mean something, right? But as time passed by, she realized reading about bloodshed did not exactly prepare one for being a part of it. She was afraid, terrified even, but she could not tell anyone, because in a war, there was no place for fear. She knew she needed to be brave. But fear was a sly enemy and it crawled into one's being when one could not fight back-in moments alone, in dreams-leaving one defenseless and paralyzed after the encounter.

She felt grateful that she, Harry, and Ron were not sent into battles just yet, but her gratitude triggered guilt. This feud was because of her, was for her, she believed. Not really for Hermione Jean Granger, but for the Muggle-borns, the Mudbloods as the other side called them. This was more her fight than those who constantly risked their lives during battles, like Moody, Lupin or even Harry, because they had magical blood and she did not. Still, she could not help but be grateful and feeling even an ounce of that brought about a wave of self-reproach. So when Tonks asked her to keep company with their house guest, who was strangely locked behind a door, she gladly did. She needed to become useful, to feel that she was not just consuming space in Andromeda's house, for her to wash away the guilt that had been consuming her completely.

Hermione did everything impeccably. She always exceeded expectation so when she was asked to accompany the man behind the door, she planned to do as told and even more. Hermione prepared breakfast for herself and for the stranger. The truth was as much as she hated not knowing how to do things, she had no idea how she was going to attend to someone that she was not allowed to see. She thought that they could eat simultaneously while she was free and he in isolation. She was not asked to feed him, but she did not think it was possible to remain sane while starving.

For a moment, Hermione considered the possibility that this person could be one of the enemy, a prisoner. She brushed it off as soon as she thought it, because Tonks would never ask her to keep a captive company; maybe to guard, but not to mingle with. In the end, she decided that she would help this man, both for Tonks and for her own sanity.

Hermione knocked on the door. "Hello. Good morning. Are you up?" She pressed her ear against the wooden door and she heard a soft grunt. She waited for more reactions from the other side of the door, but nothing came.

"Hello, again. I need you to say something if you're already up," she said with a soft voice.

"Go away." He sounded weak with his voice barely audible.

Her eyes were wide and filled with shock as she asked, "Malfoy?"

She did not know how or why she knew that voice. They rarely talked and the words he uttered were always ones of insult. She did not understand why that voice stirred something in her, something unexplainable. She assumed it was anger and rage. After all that he had done, she was bound to be furious. She experienced a lot because of this person, years worth of taunting and discrimination. It would be fine if it was only her that was harmed, if everything ended with the poison that came from his mouth. But he let the Death Eaters in Hogwarts, leaving many injured and Dumbledore gone forever.

"Go away." His voice was tired but the words were uttered fiercely.

For a moment, she doubted her assumptions. But in the next, she was positive. She knew that voice. How it ridiculed her every chance he got. Suddenly, the wounds that she buried deep were fresh once again. The blame for everything that happened at the end of their sixth year awoke in her senses. She felt the pounding of her heart and her breathing that seemed to follow each other without stop. She was enraged and her fury was taking a toll on her. She placed one hand on his door and tried to control her breathing to calm herself.

"I will leave your food. I will just look for Tonks. I will leave, but you need to eat." Her voice was stern and uncaring but confusion was getting the best of her.

Hermione frantically searched the house, feeling a sense of panic. She remembered the woman she saw upon her arrival. Thoughts raced in her mind, making her dizzy. She tried to open all the doors in the house. She pressed her ear to each one but heard nothing. She decided to check downstairs. She went to the kitchen but it was empty as well. Finally, she decided to go to the study. Her hands were already on the brass knob when she heard voices.

"But he is family, Mad-Eye! I promised my sister that I would look after him. He will not be treated as a prisoner." The voice was regal and stern. It was clear that the woman meant what she said and would not be swayed to believe otherwise.

"Sister?" Mad-Eye huffed. His eyes traveled to the door and he exclaimed, "Someone is behind the door." Like clockwork, the door burst open and revealed a very nervous Hermione. "Miss Granger, it is not polite to snoop around." Mad-Eye shot her a look that made her cringe.

It took Hermione a while before she could answer. She had only encountered Mad-Eye a few times and each time he never failed to intimidate her. For one breath, she had forgotten that she was a Gryffindor and wanted to hide in her room. In the end, she kept her head up to prove that she did nothing wrong.

"I just wanted to talk to Tonks about the man behind the door," Hermione paused. "This was the last place that I checked. I was afraid that I would be interrupting something important if I asked for her. I was about to leave, really. I'm sorry," Hermione muttered with a very apologetic voice. She did not want Mad-Eye angry. Hermione was afraid enough of the Auror during his normal days. She was sure that Mad-Eye being furious at her would just do wonders for her terror.

"It's okay, Mad-Eye. Hermione needs to be a part of this conversation. I gave her the task of accompanying him," Tonks explained anxiously.

"What?" Mad-Eye gasped and paused for a moment. "You plan to waste Hermione's talents watching over that vile creature you call your family? He is a threat to the Order. He is a Death Eater! You know what he has done. You were there, Nymphadora," Mad-Eye jeered, his voice full of contempt and malice.

"Do not call me-" Tonks snarled but stopped herself and inhaled. "He did not kill Dumbledore. He is family, Mad-Eye. My mother is right," Tonks said in a low and worried voice.

Hermione kept quiet. Although she believed that she could partake in adult discourse, she was certain that she must be not included in this one. Her principle did not stop her thoughts, while she was silent, her mind was taking part in the conversation. Apparently, she and Mad-Eye had the same sentiment but the Tonkses believed otherwise. How could she have forgotten that Andromeda was Narcissa's sister? That somehow, Tonks and Malfoy were cousins.

"Why do you care about him now, Andromeda? I thought you were estranged from your family? Hadn't they disowned you because you married a Muggle-born?" Mad-Eye questioned, evidently intrigued with the situation.

"Do not act like you know everything, Mad-Eye." Andromeda gave the Auror a glare so deadly, Hermione could not believe that Mad-Eye was still looking at her after. Andromeda continued, "He will not be treated as a prisoner. Being that this is my home, I do not even understand why we are still having this discourse," Andromeda declared. For Hermione, hearing that voice with such certainty must be the end of the conversation.

"Your house, which you volunteered for the Order!" Mad-Eye protested. "I do not trust the boy. He is a danger to all of us."

"He is not a threat, Mad-Eye!" Tonks was getting irritated by Mad-Eye's hyper-vigilance. It seemed like the repeated discussion was wearing on her and dulling the edges of her patience.

"The boy does not remember. I do not know what my sister removed from his mind, but he does not remember enough to choose to be against us. His life is in danger, You-Know-Who wants him dead. He is not safe in his own home. Do you just expect me to stand idly by as my sister suffered while her son is in danger?" Andromeda burst out while tears were falling from her eyes. "Be kind, Mad-Eye. Have sympathy for my sister and her son. Especially the boy, could you imagine not being able to remember anything about yourself, to lose everything that you are, to have no idea what is important?"

There was a split-second when Hermione thought that the Auror would yell back at Andromeda. She was dumbfounded when all Mad-Eye gave was silence and a turn towards the door. Mad-Eye never backed down for he never lost a fight… until now. Defeated, he left the three women alone.

Andromeda, Hermione and Tonks were stunned by Mad-Eye's sudden abandonment of the argument. They all knew that in battle, it was his word always. But for the first time in so many years, it was Andromeda, a woman who deeply cared for her sister and a woman who wanted to keep her nephew safe, who won.

With the argument and Mad-Eye suddenly heading out, Hermione did not fully hear what Andromeda said about Malfoy. She had wanted to ask but only silence was left between the three of them. Hermione battled with herself whether or not she should break the silence but curiosity got the better of her. "Would somebody please help me understand?"

"Mother, I do not really understand. I think you should explain to Hermione." Tonks looked at Andromeda, waiting for a response.

"As you've heard, my nephew is currently residing here and he will continue to do so until the end of the war." Andromeda gazed at Hermione.

"Mal-Draco?" Hermione gasped. She did not understand why she was so surprised. Maybe being sure and having another person confirm it were two entirely different things, she thought.

"Yes. Draco, son of my youngest sister, Narcissa, and that bastard of a man, Lucius." Moments ago, Andromeda was almost sad but the mention of Lucius made her eyes like fire. She took a deep breath to control her temper.

"Miss Granger, if you could accompany my nephew while you are here, that would be most appreciated."

"I don't know…" Hermione stammered. "I'm sorry." Hermione looked to her feet. She knew she needed to become useful but she was not sure if she could handle being around Malfoy.

"I am sorry, Hermione, but only you are here. Harry is still at Privet Drive and Ron is at the Burrow. I will do my part in caring for him, but I need to leave from time to time. Ted and I have urgent matters that require our attention. And Dora has even more pressing business to take care of." Andromeda's eyes did not leave Hermione. She waited for Hermione to look at her again.

She didn't know if she should say what she was thinking but she decided to anyway. She closed her eyes briefly before saying, "I agree with Mad-Eye." She tried to take her eyes off her feet but she realized she couldn't, once she uttered the words. "Even if I didn't, he hates me: my blood and all. Besides, even though he sounds weak, I do not think he needs me," Hermione protested.

Andromeda sighed. "He does not remember anything so whatever disputes you two shared in the past are all forgotten. My sister did not give up her son and take away his memories to become our enemy. She wants Draco to start anew, in a world that he was never a part of. You have to trust me on this Miss Granger. I will never do anything to sabotage our cause. I refuse to be the reason for our side to lose. Draco is here as my nephew, not a refugee of war and most certainly not a Death Eater." Andromeda's voice was hopeful. "Please help him."

"I still don't understand. Dumbledore was murdered. They succeeded. Why would they want Mal-Draco dead?" Hermione felt too uncomfortable to ask Draco's expectant aunt. She looked at Tonks inquisitively.

It took a while before Tonks realized that Hermione was asking her. When she did, she quickly responded, "Draco was tasked to do it. I am sure you know enough, Hermione. Harry was there."

"Yes, he told me, but I still do not understand. If they wanted Dumbledore killed, and they succeeded, wouldn't it be futile to take Mal—Draco's life?" She pressed further.

This time, it was Andromeda who answered. "As you may already know, Draco has the Dark Mark. They did not deem him worthy enough to be a Death Eater. If one could not take a life, what purpose would that person have in their beliefs?" She uttered those words with so much conviction that Hermione could not help but ponder on them.

She fell silent. It seemed that the world had stopped. She had to remember to breath. She inhaled deeply and slowly exhaled. "I will do it."

After her words, stillness filled the room. Andromeda and Tonks smiled at her. She thought of Draco Malfoy, of the boy she went to school with. She remembered Harry's story about the night in the Astronomy Tower, how Malfoy had the chance to kill Dumbledore. The Headmaster was defenseless; he just needed to say _"Avada Kedavra"_and he could have been the most celebrated Death Eater. Instead, he lowered his wand. Now, he was suffering because of the choice he made. She considered the idea that maybe, just maybe, he wasn't evil after all.

A ray of sunlight entered the room. Hermione never understood Draco Malfoy but in that moment, everything seemed clearer.

Of course, reviews are loved! I also would like thank my lovely betas, Ariana and Daena for helping me with this story!


	8. Chapter 8

This has got to be one of the most important chapters that I have ever written. It just means so much to Draco and Hermione's relationship. I enjoyed writing this so I hope that you guys would also enjoy reading it.

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Chapter 8 – Unsave Me

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It was a wonderful morning, no less beautiful than all the mornings Hermione had experienced in the days that she had lived at the Tonks residence. Like always, she went out of the house with a cup of tea in her hand just a little before dawn and enjoyed watching the dark sky become colored yellow.

She fell asleep thinking of Draco Malfoy. She had not seen him yet, but she heard his voice. It was recognizable but so different. She had never heard him so defeated and weak. What would he be without his arrogance? What would Draco Malfoy be without his memories? Probably still the same, she thought.

Her acceptance of the favor Andromeda asked was too easy. She realized that she had not thought about it thoroughly. Maybe it was all a lie. Maybe he did not really forget. Maybe he was there to prove that he was indeed, evil. Maybe he was doing a twisted Death Eater mission. Maybe they knew that she was at the Tonks residence and they would use her to get to Harry. The thought made her shiver. She couldn't allow that. She decided that she would find out the truth. She would do everything in her power to unravel the mystery behind Draco Malfoy's missing memories. She regretted her decision, but she knew she could not take it back, so she inhaled and accepted her fate.

No matter what beauty was presented before her eyes, she could not savor it anymore. The thought of Draco Malfoy-egotistical prat and Death Eater-could surely ruin anything, no matter how bright and wonderful that thing was. Hesitantly, she walked inside the house and went to Draco Malfoy's room.

Her knock was different, not so gentle anymore. She did not give a damn whether the person inside the room woke up or died, for that matter. She just needed to do what she was asked to do, to mute her guilt for having a little taste of paradise in the middle of a wretched war.

"Malfoy?" She tried to keep her voice down. Of course, he's going to be bloody difficult. "Malfoy?" Her voice was too loud the second time, leading Tonks to open her door.

"Go away," or what sounded like it, was muffled behind the door. Before she could yell one more time and break down the door, she heard Tonks' voice.

"Hermione, is anything wrong?" Tonks stood in front of her door, still in her pajamas, her blanket wrapped around her.

"No, nothing is wrong." Hermione smiled. "Go back to sleep, Tonks."

"Are you sure?" Tonks murmured while her eyes were still closed.

"Absolutely. You need to rest. Go back to sleep, Tonks." Hermione gave another smile. Her cheeks hurt because she was not really amused by the situation.

Hermione waited for Tonks' door to close before she gave her last knock. She counted up to ten, giving the git on the other side time to answer her. She waited for three breaths and whispered, "Alohamora." She made sure she did it quietly. She murmured, "Muffliato," to make sure that no one would hear whatever would transpire between them.

She opened the door, more quietly than she desired. The prat was still lying on his bed, his face towards the wall. She wanted to clear her throat to announce her presence but the sound of sniffing stopped her.

Oh, this is good, she reckoned. If Draco Malfoy thought that she was going to buy what he was selling, well, he was dead wrong.

"Is the great Draco Malfoy actually crying?" she mocked.

"If a door is locked, it means you have to stay out. Go away." The voice was now free from any trace of crying. Hermione could almost feel the rage emanating from it.

"Awww. Too weak to be away from Mum, eh?" Hermione continued. She decided to take small steps towards the bed.

"I said, go away." She almost flinched. The voice was powerful and commanding but she was determined to discover his plans. She took the final few steps towards the bed.

"Why are you here, Malfoy? Did you come to spread your little Death Eater terror? Are you here to redeem yourself and finally prove that you are indeed, evil? Tell me, come on." Hermione paused, waiting for Draco to answer. "You've got a good show going, with your tears and all. They all believe you. But I don't." She sat on the bed and moved closer to Draco.

"I don't know what you're talking about." Draco breathed in deeply, controlling his fury. "I said, go away. Consider this your last warning." Draco pushed her away and walked towards the window.

"If you think I am scared of you because of the violation you made to your forearm, you are dead-wrong." Hermione decided to stand up and walk around the room.

In a blink of an eye, Draco was able to corner Hermione. She was against the wall and his arms were locking her in. She could feel his hot breath on her face as he spoke. "I do not know what the fuck you are talking about."

"Get off me!" Hermione tried to push him away but he was too strong. It surprised her that someone that seemed so weak could have that much strength.

"No, listen to me first." His eyes pierced through her, making her shudder.

"I won't." She paused. "I am not afraid of you." She tried to intimidate him with her gaze but her voice gave her away.

"Then why does your voice tremble so?" He whispered into her ear. "Listen to me, silly little girl. How I wish that this was all a ruse, a mission to spread my 'little Death Eater terror,' as you put it." He inhaled and searched for her eyes. "But it is not." She could feel his arms and his whole body trembling.

"What is this then?" she spat.

"This," he took a deep breath, "is real." He moved his face closer to her and tried to speak calmly. "I do not have any fucking memories, so whatever you think I was, I do not remember. I have no fucking recollection, so I am afraid that I am not that person anymore. I do not know myself, so it is impossible that you do." He paused and then screamed, "You do not get to say shit about me." Draco shoved her to the side, making her lose her balance. He caught Hermione's arm before she could fall.

She shook his hand off and yelled, "I know everything I need to know!"

His voice was louder and more powerful. "Explain to me, how you could know me if I don't even know a fucking thing about myself?" Draco jeered. "What? Are you this woman?" Draco threw the portrait with his mother at Hermione.

Hermione caught the photograph. She looked at it for a moment and fell silent. Then, she gently laid it on the table. Her voice was calmer. "No, but we went to school together. I've known you for six years."

She really wanted to mention the Dark Mark, that he sold his soul to the most evil wizard of all time, but Narcissa's sapphire eyes stopped her.

"And you think that's fucking enough?"

"No, but…" Her voice trailed off.

"Fucking no, right? So shut up. Quit it. I am having a hard time as it is. Stop insisting that I am the person you think I am because you. Don't. Fucking. Know. Anything." Draco took a deep breath and whispered with a trembling voice, "Leave."

Hermione was not one to keep quiet after an argument. She was almost never wrong but she knew that this time, she could be.

She left Draco's room and entered her own. She lay down on her bed and stared at the ceiling. Unwelcome thoughts entered her mind, thoughts that made her feel guilty. She closed her eyes and wished for sleep. She couldn't. Her heart was racing. It seemed like her conscience was running after her, physically exhausting her even though she was perfectly still on the bed. She put her hands on her face and inhaled.

Draco Malfoy, the arrogant bully who made her time in Hogwarts as uncomfortable for her as possible. Now he was nobody, a man without a past and a very uncertain future.

Draco Malfoy was prejudiced towards her and her kind, but after what had occurred between them, she realized that she was a bigot, too. Didn't she judge him? Didn't she act like she knew everything there was to know about him? Wasn't she too hasty to put a label on Draco Malfoy? She could not allow that. She could not hate being called a Mudblood and prance around judging other people. She was not even sure if this Draco Malfoy who shoved her and held her was still the same Draco Malfoy who bullied her to no end. More importantly, in a war, there is no place for division, only unity. Draco Malfoy may not yet be on their side but he was under their care. Residing here and without his memories, he might as well be a member of the Order.

She thought of the enticing woman with long champagne-colored tresses and kind blue eyes. Narcissa. The very same woman she tried to Stupefy days ago. She felt sorry for her. In this world, they were the two people who understood each other. Hermione loved her parents but she made them forget her. She took herself away from them and cultivated false memories. She made them believe that they had another surname, led different lives and that they never had a daughter.

Narcissa loved Draco, but she made him forget. She even erased his name from his mind. Hermione was glad that her parents did not know that they were missing anything. The knowledge of saving them from pain dulled the longing that she felt. At that moment, Hermione decided to give Draco a chance because she could not imagine, with her thirst for knowledge, not knowing a single thing about herself. But her decision was done more for Narcissa, with whom she completely identified. She would not want anyone to make her parents miserable, especially after the things they all had to give up.

She felt tears streaming down her face. She missed her parents but she knew she was also crying because of guilt. Her tears were for Draco and Narcissa, too. She wept for them, for a mother who had to give up her son and for a boy who had to lose everything just to be alive. It hurt her. She may not like them, but she understood. She cried and cried until her eyelids were too heavy and she had to close her eyes.

Her darkness was illuminated by thoughts of the platinum blond man. The row between her and Draco was her fault. She provoked him. He was already wounded, and she insulted his injuries. She even questioned his credibility, judged his hurt. It made her exactly like him when they were still in Hogwarts. She hated herself for that. Maybe everything could change. Maybe he and she could mature.

What would Draco Malfoy be without his arrogance? What would he be without his memories? Hopefully different, she now thought.

Hermione pondered and pondered. There was a growing voice inside of her saying that she was wrong, that Draco Malfoy was right. Who was she to judge him and who was she to claim that she knew him? Back in school, they shared nothing but taunting moments. It was true that Draco Malfoy was a bully but he was not evil. It seemed like Draco Malfoy already outgrew his bullying because since Voldemort's return, the all-powerful Malfoy family was reduced to mere pawns. A taste of one's medicine is the perfect cure for one's illness. Yes, he let the Death Eaters enter Hogwarts, but his family was on the line. Yes, he almost killed Dumbledore. He had the chance. Dumbledore was defenseless. If he could not perform the Avada, the old man was just a push away from death. Yet, he did not do it. Maybe, just maybe, there was really something good in Draco Malfoy.

Everything went dark again but she heard the sound of crying from a distance. She walked and searched for it. The weeping seemed to be done out of hopelessness, as if the person was already at the breaking point. She took a few more steps and found the back of a woman whose golden hair seemed to brighten the dark and empty space. Hermione moved closer to her and tried to reach for her. Before Hermione could touch her, the woman had already turned around. Hermione could see her red and puffy eyes and fresh tears flowing from them. Hermione just looked at her, unable to say something.

The woman took her hand and begged, "Please, help him. Help me."

Just when she was about to say something, the woman disappeared and she was engulfed by the darkness once again.

Hermione opened her eyes. Rays of orange filled the room. It surprised her that it was already dusk. It was the longest sleep she'd had in days. It was the most restful too, save for the dream about Narcissa. A few minutes into consciousness and she was already deep in thought. Hermione didn't think she would fall asleep. She certainly didn't expect to dream of Narcissa. But those things happened and she believed that everything happened for a reason. Maybe she needed the slumber so that the universe could send a message. She should help Draco Malfoy, if not for his own well-being, then for Narcissa.

She stood from her bed and rummaged through her trunk to find a quill and a piece of parchment. She was rarely wrong but when she was, she knew she needed to apologize. She was too ashamed to be able to look him in the eye and say that she was sorry. She did the next best thing.

"Draco Malfoy,

It was wrong of me to do what I did. I am sorry.

Hermione Granger."

It was a simple note but she meant it and she wished that it would be enough. She folded it and went out of her room. She slid her letter down the crevice at the bottom of the door. She knocked and ran towards the stairs. Her actions almost made her laugh: a bloody Gryffindor, running away because of guilt. Why she couldn't face him, she really didn't know.

Hermione went outside to clear her mind. As she laid her eyes on the beautiful sunset, her thoughts drifted to her parents and her heart wished that they were happy and safe. She imagined Narcissa, on the other side of the war, wishing the same thing for her son.

In that moment, she resolved that she would do everything in her power to protect Draco Malfoy.

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I would like to thank my betas, Ariana and Daena for helping me with this fic. Of course, thank you readers, you keep me going! Reviews are loved!


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9 - Wandering Souls**

Draco did not know how they expected him to bear the situation. Surely no one in his right mind would just agree to be kept in the dark, to trust strangers and to be amenable to the screaming fact that he had no idea who he was. He was lost, but he wasn't. In being astray, there must be some sense of where one wanted to go, but somewhere along the path, that person wandered off to a different direction. He had no direction. He was not lost. He did not even know where the hell he came from, and they would not tell him, would not even give him a single strand of enlightenment. He could not allow himself to be so helpless anymore. He would lose himself, completely, with no one telling him what he must do. He would kill himself.

His Aunt told him, over and over that his mother loved him so much that she gave him up for him to be able to start anew. His dreams told otherwise. His only recollection of the past had a different story. He was at the edge of a cliff, similar to where he was. His mother, the woman in the photograph he kept was across him, muttering something. In the reverie, he was so confused that he just stood and watched that woman as her lips moved. She raised a wooden stick and yelled another incomprehensible word. A flash of red light travelled towards him. Then, he was flying. He closed his eyes and embraced his coming demise.

Then he woke up. He was not even afraid. Surely, if you dreamt of your death, you must be afraid, right? But he wasn't. All that was left in him was and the strong determination to end his life. The morning after the dream was a beautiful one. The rays of the sun entered his room. He walked towards his window and admired the simple but grand splendor of the place. Then he just knew, he was just certain that he had to say goodbye to the world, to this world. It was clear that he did not belong there, that the people in the house knew nothing about him.

It was acceptable that the people in this god-forsaken place did not want him to know anything. He understood that, maybe not completely but he was trying. He got up from his bed every morning blindly accepting that they knew enough to enlighten him but for some reason, they were refusing to do so. But to lie to him? To make him believe that his mother loved him when she just muttered and launched him off a cliff was unacceptable. He wished to just have fallen, for his body to hit the rocks below or for him to be just swallowed by the sea.

Draco was so angry. He was consumed by his rage. They were toying with him. They made him a pawn in this elaborate chess game, made him believe in things that were not close to the truth at all. He loathed them - his aunt, his uncle, his cousin and the stranger with the unruly brown hair—but he despised his mother most of all. How could a mother even think of killing her own son? Was he so undesirable that she had to throw him off a fucking cliff?

Draco went outside of his room, silently thanked whoever there was in control of his fate that nobody was up yet. In a heartbeat, he cursed that all-knowing entity too. Why me? Why the hell me? Why the fuck me? Why must I be a victim in of this chaos? Why? He wanted to scream but decided against it. The people in the place he was living in were, he felt, too noble for suicide.

There were so many ways to take one's life. He could just go to the kitchen, grab a knife and slit his throat. There were a number of odd-looking bottles in the cabinet in the loo. If he drank all of those, he was sure that something bad would happen to him. There were so many ways but he chose to jump off a cliff. There was something very poetic about finishing what his mother started. He was not doing it to help his mother in her plans of eliminating him from the world but to mock her. He wanted to show to show her wonderful was he especially in the task that his mother failed to do.

He went outside, immersed himself in the glory and warmth of the sun. He wanted to run and embrace death's arms but he decided to really live his last few moments. It was what his Aunt told him to do. He did not want to be too defiant. He wanted to do something for all of them, his mother, his aunt and all the other people he met in his very short rebirth. For them, he would savor his final breaths.

He walked, as slowly as he could towards the end of the cliff, answering the call of the sky, the sun and the sea. He closed his eyes and jumped. Once again, he was flying. He was again under the familiar sensation that he experienced in his dreams mere hours ago. He closed his eyes, bracing for the fall. He waited and waited but he was just there, suspended in mid-air.

"Are you mental?" He heard a voice, livid beyond measure.

He felt himself moving but not towards the unknown depths of the sea but towards the ground he walked on just moments before his jump. The sense of floating left him and he was down on the ground with a loud thud. His short fall hurt more than it should have. It was obvious to him that he was carelessly dropped on purpose but he did not care. He should have been dead by now, lost forever not sprawled on the ground enduring back pains.

"What the hell were you thinking?" The voice was more furious now, if that was possible. He remained unmoving, wishing that the save was too late.

He heard footsteps running towards him. The rush was too evident. He could almost sense the panic in them. "Have you completely lost your mind?" Now, the voice was yelling at his face. He shut his eyes tighter, wishing for death to come. As if the thunderous voice wasn't enough, he felt a loud smack of a palm against his face.

That was enough. He sat up and pushed the woman sitting beside him. What he did shocked him. He held her arm but she already stumbled. He was lost for a minute or so, he breathed deeply and remembered his rage. He yelled, "In case, you are too defunct to notice, yes I have lost my mind. I don't remember shit about me and you, you have been going around like you are some sort of god who have known me all my life!" He could feel his whole body warm up, his eyes blazing and his pale face red with fury.

"But I…" Hermione gaped at him, trailing into silence.

"No, you should have just let me die! Why did you save me, why? Yesterday I was a monster to you! You accused me of faking everything!" Draco's voice, together with his whole body trembled with anger.

"But I said sorry!" Hermione stood up and exclaimed.

"You think that's enough? You think apologizing will do anything? Well, you are fucking wrong!" Draco helped himself up as well. He looked at Hermione and tried to burn her with her stared.

"You tried to kill yourself because of what I said?" Hermione gasped. It took her one deep breath before she could speak again, "I'm-"

"You do not matter to me! I could not care less!" Draco screamed. His words were out of his mouth before he could think. He was aware that he was cruel but he only spoke of the truth. Who did this woman think she was? She was delusional to even consider that her words wounded him enough to decide that he wanted to die. His injuries stemmed from something deeper and greater, something that his mother took away from him, his past.

"Then why?" Hermione's voice was kind, almost concerned. She tried to touch Draco's shoulder but he brushed her hand off.

"Nobody wants me alive anyway." Draco took a deep breath and yelled, "My own mother tried to kill me!" The betrayal was evident in Draco's voice and it was making his voice quaver.

Since his dream, he thought about his mother trying to murder him countless of times. It hurt him but the agony was greater once he said it out loud. For a moment, the viciousness of his demeanor was gone.

"That's not true!" Hermione defended.

"There you go again, acting like you fucking know everything." He shouted once more but his voice trailed as his eyes searched for his shoes, "I saw it, with my own eyes. I gather she _Obliviated_ me before she launched me off a cliff."

"You don't know anything!" Hermione cried.

"That's fucking right! I don't know anything so I don't want to be anything. I want to disappear into nothingness. Why couldn't you just have left me alone?" His temper was escalating. How dare this woman rub it in my face that I am basically nothing, he thought.

"Because I understand…" Hermione murmured.

"You know you don't! Must you lie to me all the time?" Draco was so consumed by his wrath. He wanted to push her, hurt her in any way he could but he stopped himself. She was still a woman, he thought.

"Not you." Hermione paused, "Your mother. I understand your mother."

"Have you ever tried to kill your own son?"

"No but I also made the ones I love forget."

"And you want me to be happy about that? Do you want me to rejoice in the fact that both you and my mother do not have enough respect for the minds of other people? Do you?"

"No—"

"So you don't get to say anything!"

Hermione held Draco's shoulders and shook him. It surprised her how she was able to do it since the man was considerable taller than her. Maybe it was her understanding of Narcissa. She wouldn't let Draco think ill of his mother, the same way that she wouldn't want her parents to hate her. She just desperately wanted him to understand. "Listen to me!" She screamed. Her sudden control of the situation shocked Draco. Draco just stared at her, dumbfounded.

She continued, "You know nothing and yet you do not let us explain. You do not even ask! You just do rash things without even thinking. You have lost your memories but not your mind! You could think! You know that's not true! You know your mother did not try to kill you! How could she when you are here perfectly safe?" Her words were almost a plea. She will do whatever it takes for Draco to realize that what Narcissa did had to be done, that Narcissa's actions were ultimately for his protection.

"But I saw it… I saw her. I felt the red light crash against my chest." Hermione's words made Draco doubt what he fiercely believed in. He could feel her despair although he did not understand why.

"Ask Draco, ask! You just can't do this. She had given up so much for you to be safe. You can't do this to her!" Now, it was Hermione's turn to be angry. She knew that she had no right to be but if not anger, there would be hopelessness. Hope was something too valuable for her so she held on to her rage.

"I can't?" Draco hissed. "I can't?" This time, he yelled. "Did she ask me if I wanted to forget everything? She did not! She just decided that it would be best to toy with my mind without even asking me! I might have understood!"

"You still wouldn't have remembered."

"She could have explained."

"Why do you act like you know everything?"

"Because I did the same thing." Hermione spoke softly then continued, "I made the ones I love forget me."

"Forget you?"

"I erased myself from their minds…" Her voice trailed and tears escaped her eyes. "They do not know that they are missing something. You are fortunate, at least you know there is something you have to search for."

"It's just too hard. I lost everything. I feel so astray, so alone."

"You did not lose everything. You still have us."

"You know I don't belong here."

"I know I might have implied that but I could be wrong."

"You are right."

"How can you be so certain? Since you've arrived you've done nothing but sulk and ignore us."

"What did you want me to do? Did you want me to celebrate the fact that I am left with nothing and that I am sharing a house with strangers?"

"But we are all you have."

"You do not really care for me. You just have to."

"Then help us, help us feel for you beyond our responsibilities."

"I can't. Just leave me be."

"I won't. You have me. You'll always have me."Hermione looked into his eyes. She touched his hand and gave him a small smile.


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